Choosing my Life Partner is my Right, Not a Committee Decision
One of the reasons why relationships and marriages nowadays do not last is because of the family.
Some parents have stereotypes about some tribes, and they don't want their children to have anything to do with them. Some do not want their daughter to marry a Christian because they are Muslim, and vice versa, some do not want their children to marry into a particular state because of what they have heard about people from that state or their bad encounter with one of the indigene.
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Love doesn't announce its coming, it comes like a thief in the night and steals away our heart, so we never know when and who we are going to fall in love with... Some people have lost their soul mate because their family was against their union.
We are now in a civilized world. We have less of that crap, children are standing up for themselves and do not care what their parents have to say regarding their partner, such is the case of one of my coursemates, whose parents told her they can't allow her to marry an Igbo, someone who has a tattoo, someone who smokes and drinks.
Her ex has none of the things they listed, but she didn't enjoy the relationship because of the way the guy treated her; it was a toxic relationship and she later left, now the new guy she found herself in a relationship with is an igbo man, he drinks and smoke and has tattoo on his body but she is happy in the relationship...
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He cherishes her, cares for her, and also respects her. he is the kind of guy she has always wanted, but the only problem is her family; they don't want her to marry him because of his tribe...
She told them they can't decide who she was going to spend the rest of her life with; she is going to be the one in the relationship/marriage, not them, so that decision lies with her, and if they can't respect her decision, they can disown her.
In the end, she won, and she will be getting married tomorrow. She fought for herself and won. Unfortunately, we still have people who listen to their parents when choosing a life partner.
If I ever find myself in such a situation, I will first try to convince them, but if they are adamant and refuse to listen to me, then no point in trying to reason with them; I will do what is on my mind, and I don't care what comes out of it.
My life, my choices, and I won't let anyone[not even my family] tell me how to live my life, we only live once!
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Every boy and girl has the right to choose their partner according to their needs. If they don't, there will be problems later. If they make that decision now based on the opinions of their relatives, there will be many problems in both their lives later on.
big problems in the future, no doubt.
Yeah.
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That’s true. Some parents will impose marrying a particular partner on their children which isn’t supposed to be so
Life is free. Our parents should give us the freedom to marry whom we like
Such is now outdated and the good thing is the parent are now adjusting, no child want to be decided for anymore when it comes to choosing his or her life partner.
If two people are in love, their religion should not be an issue, and one should go for the love they cherish. But I will try my best not to fall in love with a person from a different religion because it brings trouble for both of us. After all, in a society, we may face various kinds of pressure. But you also said love comes unnoticed and we can't control it.
In case of getting married by family choice, I don't have any issue as I didn't find anyone to love, but if I find anyone, I won't give up in that case even if for that I need to go against family, because It's my life and I have the right to choose my life partners.
i think there is a big issue with parent deciding or choosing for us, what if the person they choose for us doesn't love us, the feelings needs to be mutual for it to work.
That's why I think if you find someone you love you need to brave for it and face everything even if everyone is against you.
The title of this post made me laugh🤣🤣🤣
It makes so much sense though. Whether they accept your partner or not, you’ll still be the only one in the marriage.
lol abi na, they can't decide for me to marry a problem when in the end, i will be the only one to suffer the consequence of their decision.
Grateful we now live in a world that's more open to us making our own choices and having the ability to stand by it. I mean, at the end of the day, you can't really let anyone tell you what to experience and what not to experience as that would go against the essence of existence.
The new parents are understanding because they understand how it feels when their parents make decisions for them. It will only get better now.
It's necessary to understand that we'll seek the family's consent in marriage but it's not their place to make the final decision.....
Nice post I did learn alot
Yeah, their consent is only needed for formality...
My life, my choice.
I know our parents mean well, but most times their reasons aren't that valid or reasonable enough in this generation.
Love is worth fighting for, tribe isn't enough reason to not be with who I love.
Thanks for sharing.
Imagine being told you can't marry someone because they come from a particular tribe or because of their religion...