THE WEB OF FAILURE

It started when I decided I was going to grow my skills. I just got a job and was ready to prove myself capable of fitting into the company's system and getting the job done. This wasn't something that came naturally to me as I only knew about 50% of my job description and had just theoretical knowledge of the remaining 50%. You can't blame me for choosing to do something I wasn't sure of as a job because I needed the money so much and wasn't going to allow it to pass me by because I wasn't vast in knowledge of one particular subject. Mind you I was always sincere in my approach and never tried deceiving my employers, I simply allowed them to understand that I'm someone who thrives under pressure and would do anything and everything to get the job done including going out of my way to learn new things.

I think this was what stood me out and got me the job. On getting the job I was enthusiastic about everything I was going to learn, I knew it was going to be tough, but I was more than ready to put every bit of work into making it work. But then again I was faced with the dilemma of actually getting the job done. It wasn't as easy as theory made it look. I had always been a digital marketer, and for the first time, I was going into web development and cyber security professionally. The first major task that made me question myself was when I saw first-hand how many hackers had built a maze in the company server. I'm a newbie for crying out loud, now I have to deal with professional hackers who have years of experience in this field.

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What could I possibly do to cut down all their tactics? They will always be one step ahead of me no matter what I do. These were some of the many thoughts running through my head as I tried to picture the only way I knew how to stop the attacks. Our database had been corrupted so I took my time to fish out every single detail in over 23,000 files to exterminate the malware in them. I scanned every single one of those files, only for the database to be filled with three times the amount that was there before. It was the first time the company server tried to fight a hacker attack, it was only necessary they replied with three times the effort. Viewing the situation from the perspective of a newbie, it only confirmed my fears, but me being me would never go down without trying everything to make it work.

Now I had tried the things I knew, it was high time I tried the things I did not know. Trying something I did not know became harder than I thought, all I wanted was a solution, but my mind was clustered around my failed attempts and things I knew. It was as though everything I tried had successfully built webs that needed to be cleared in my head. I needed reassurance, I needed hope, but here I was entangled in a web of frustration because I did not know the way forward. If I could exchange my head with someone at that moment, I would gladly do it, but I was caught in between figuring things out on my own, or telling my company I was not good enough for the job.

I really wanted to be good enough so I told myself I wasn't going to think about it through the weekend, and just see where it leads. I was tired of worrying, I just wanted to rest and have a bit of fresh air. I got the fresh air and more when I got home that night and saw an ad that introduced a software to check everything you do at the backend. It works more like a spam detector but with more functions. And it was at that moment, that I could really breathe that fresh air feeling clean in my head, not because I wanted to get the software, but because it gave me an idea of the solution. All I needed to do now was talk to my company about the idea of some software that would make my work efficient. I'm not a pro, and I do not dispute the fact, but with this software, I would get to do my job like one.

THIS IS MY ENTRY INTO THE INKWELL CREATIVE NONFICTION [PROMPT](Creative nonfiction prompt 115 https://peakd.com/hive-170798/@theinkwell/creative-nonfiction-prompt-115) #115