The Dark Power Of Communication

I’ve heard so much about how powerful communication is but today, I also found out it has a dark side. And the confusing part about it is that you might not even know that you are harnessing the dark side of it.

So I was listening to an interview between a couple where they both spoke their hearts out on pressing matters. The first topic was communication. So they met when they were really young: somewhere in their early twenties.

The lady made it clear that the man at that time was the sweetest man she had met in a long time. But after some months, he started being manipulative. I’m guessing they already spoke about this before coming on camera because the man started laughing after he heard this part.

So according to the lady, the man was always controlling her, guilt tripping her, love bombing her and trying to put her in a bubble. For those who don’t know what love bombing means, it’s basically overwhelming someone with affection so much so that they can’t even think for themselves, and they become emotionally dependent on you. And sometimes it becomes like this form of addiction where they can’t and don’t want to do anything without the other person.

And this is so wrong people everyone should be able to live on their own first before living with someone. Everyone should be able to make themselves happy before accepting happiness from somewhere else. And sometimes you might even end up seeking validation from the person all the time which eventually leads to self doubt because until the person says you’re pretty or handsome, you’d never feel so.

The man spoke up and I was surprised at what he said. So according to him, he was just communicating. He thought women love confident men so he thought he always had to be strict in his decisions.( I don’t entirely understand that, but I’m guessing it has something to do with maybe telling the woman not to go somewhere for her own safety. But not explaining it to her and then making it seem like he’s forcing her to stay home)

He also said he thought women love assurance and being loved so he was just doing that. But not knowing that with how he was doing it, he was being manipulative. The conversation went on and on but one thing I have come to understand is guilt tripping. It’s easier to guilt trip someone without even realizing so to avoid that, just make use of your “I”s instead of “you”. I was really sad because we couldn’t hangout instead of you made me really sad…”

I don’t know if communication is included when they say too much of everything is bad. But if it’s not, then I’d say communication in a certain direction is not just bad but also dark.