The Advice Trap

I overheard a conversation between two men somewhere last week. One was telling the other to be mean to a lady he was talking to. He explained that he had to man up and ignore the lady most of the time. If the lady doesn’t call, he shouldn’t also call. Even if she calls, she shouldn’t always answer. And when it comes to texts, he should make sure to always reply her 2 to 3 hours later.

Honestly, I didn’t really understand the science behind what he was telling his friend. Why would you ignore someone you are talking to? Someone you want to build something with? Why would you even listen to such advice in the first place? But then, I just decided to mind my business.

Just today, we saw the advisor with the lady. They were really close physically, and you didn’t need anyone to tell you something was going on between them. I don’t know who went to inform the advisee what was happening between the two of them but he came to cause a subtle scene.

He asked the other guy if that was the intention behind the advice he gave him. And all he kept saying was he didn’t know he was going to do what he said. I kept laughing as I watched the whole thing unfold. I just couldn’t believe that he actually listened to that advice.

From what I saw, it’s obvious the lady actually likes the advisee, not the advisor but I just wonder what happened for her to switch so fast. Anyway, I just hope they resolve the issue and just move on.

Sometimes I wonder how people just get up and heed any advice they hear. The worst ones are even with the motivational speaker. I know someone who got an ulcer because she was saving all her money to buy a car. And that was a piece of advice she heard from a motivational speaker. In the end, she had to and is still using the money she was saving for the car to pay for her ulcer medication.

I’m not saying advice is not good. It really is but we all know what is good and bad. And most importantly, what works for us and what doesn’t so when we hear all sorts of advice, let’s make it a point to heed the logical ones that work for us. We are in an era where everyone just wakes up and set camera to give advice so if you are not careful, you’ll just fall in several traps of advice.