Tendrils of experience

When I was growing up, I always had a problem with my mom. I didn’t understand most of the things she did, and no explanation made me see things her way. We had this neighbor who was more like my mom’s best friend. They did everything together, to the extent that they even looked like sisters.

Although I was just a kid, there were times I noticed our neighbor was taking advantage of my mom. She would do things to piss my mom off, and then my mom would just apologize so peace would reign. There were times I overheard them having arguments about finances, and most times, my mom was asking for her money back.

Through all these, they still remained friends until one fateful day. It was during the Covid-19 time. My mom was sick and couldn’t even move. So my neighbor wanted to come and do something in our kitchen, and from what I remember, it involved the use of toxic chemicals.

Even after knowing that the chemicals were toxic, my mom permitted her to do it in our compound, which got me angry from the beginning. But then our neighbor still wanted to use our kitchen. And up till now, it doesn’t even make sense to me because why would you try to expose us to toxic chemicals in the first place?

After going back and forth, this neighbor of ours decided to still go ahead and use our kitchen without my mom’s permission. I remember seeing my neighbor pouring certain things on our kitchen floor one afternoon. Since my mom couldn’t walk at that time, she didn’t even know what was going on, so I had to call my brothers to come and see.
And that was when everything escalated. They had a huge fight where we all witnessed the true colors of our neighbor.

Since then, my mom decided to always be in her lane. But one thing I witnessed my mom do was how she was always helping this woman anytime she needed support.
To be very honest, it always just annoyed me to see my mom go to lengths to be there for her after everything she did to us.

It even became more serious when her husband joined her to fight with my mom all the time. But anytime they needed help, my mom never hesitated to be there for them. Years later, the man passed away, and none of the grudges he had with my mom mattered anymore.

That was when I learned an important lesson in life. Humans can be complicated sometimes, but no matter what we do, we are all we have, so if you can help someone when they are in trouble, don’t hesitate. And that’s something I’ve been living with for years.

I hate having grudges with people, but even when someone is having an issue with me, I never shut them out. I never push them far away, and I just make sure to be there for them when they need me. Because you never really know when the last time you’re going to see someone will be, and you wouldn’t want it to be you not helping them just because of a simple grudge.