The Clown's Dilemma

“Boooo..”, the children jeered at him. “You are no fun.” A girl around the age of six with pouty lips said. “We want Smiley instead.” Another boy said. The children started dispersing to other fun activities, leaving Jack, the Grumpy where he stood.

This was the turn his career had taken since Smiley, a rival clown had arrived in town. Well, he would blame it on Smiley. He was once the town’s best clown. Children always wanted to play with him and be around him. They always waited his arrival at parties and school events. And sometimes, when he arrived late due to circumstances, he would meet children crying to their parents, asking for him. That was how his life had been. Making children happy and in turn, making himself happy. He had made it his life’s purpose to bring joy and excitement into a child's life before adolescent years and adulthood took it's toll on them and he had excelled in that purpose. Well, until the accident happened. The accident that changed everything.

Jack removed his clown costume and stuffed it into his bag, mopping the sweat from his brow with a frown on his face. “I have failed. Again.”, he thought to himself. He slouched to his car without waiting for his payment. He didn't need it anyway. The payment he expected were the smiles on the children's face, not the money. When he got home, he dumped the bag on the couch and went to the kitchen to make himself toast, after which he would retire to his bedroom for the rest of the day. He had nothing else to do.

Jack woke up the next morning. He had a gig to do by 2 in the afternoon. He hoped the day would turn out better than yesterday. After freshening up and eating breakfast, he went to the living room where he had dropped his bag. Opening it, he couldn't find his costume. He spilled the contents of his bag on the couch, but it was nowhere to be seen.

“I'm pretty sure I put it in my bag. Or was it in the car?” He rushed to the car, opening and closing doors but the costume was nowhere to be found. He pushed his hand through his hair, wondering where it was. Did he leave it at the scene? He rushed into his house and grabbed his car keys. He was going to check if he had left it there.

On getting to the scene, there was no costume on the lawn, so he knocked on the door of the host.

“Hey, Jack. You left early yesterday.” A pretty petite woman said after opening the door.

“Yes, I had a migraine. Umm, did you by chance, pick up my clown costume? I can't seem to find it.”

“Ohh, no. The cleaners would have reported it to me if they had seen anything of that sort. Maybe, you should check home again. By the way, can you wait for your payment?”

“Maybe later, Brit. Thank you.” He walked fast to his car, sweat beading on his forehead. That clown costume gave him purpose. To other people, it might have seemed a petty thing, being a clown and being so passionate about it. But to him, it was what grounded him. From the first time he had worn a costume as a push-in substitute and he had made children laugh so hard, they had rolled on the floor. He just knew it was what he was meant to do. And now, his costume was gone. He could have gone ahead to rent another costume or buy another one, but this particular one was a gift from his wife and so it was important.

Where could it be? Panic was already bubbling in the pit of his belly. “Relax,”, he told himself. “This is just a minor inconvenience. We will find it.”

Jack got home. Trying to understand how his costume disappeared overnight. He sat on the couch where he had dropped his bag, placing his heads on his hand. That was when he saw the piece of paper lying on the floor. He picked it up and saw,
MEET ME AT THE TOWN PARK. -SMILEY.

P.S: YOUR COSTUME IS WITH ME. I KNOW YOU WILL BE MAD BUT I THINK I MIGHT HAVE THE SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM.

Anger surged in him, and he clenched his fists, stalking out of the house. How dare Smiley? How could he trespass into his house and steal something. He was going to report the matter to the town Sheriff. But first, his costume.

He got to the park and saw a lady sitting on a bench. She was the only one in the park. So, he thought Smiley hadn't arrived, not until he noticed her pulling a clown mask from a duffel bag. She smiled at him, then patted the spot beside her. “You're Smiley???” It came as a big surprise to him. He hadn't expected a… well, lady and a really pretty one at that. Her hair was cut low and dyed white and she had lovely gray eyes. She was tall and lanky, but quite at ease with herself.

“Surprised much?? Ohh, well. I know I will get this reaction if other people found out Smiley is a lady.” She said in a lilting voice.

“I always thought you were a man. I have seen you perform. You sounded like a man.”

“I'm quite good at impersonating.” She spoke in the voice he actually knew as Smiley's.

“Yes, you are. But I am actually here to know why you stole into my home to take my costume.”

“Ohh, okay. Hitting the nail on the end then. I hear you have been having some trouble with your job. Actually, I heard a lot about you. And I think I might be of some help.”

“Well, if I’m having trouble, it's because you came here and stole my audience from me. The children loved me and you came, and now, I'm the boring one.”

“ I don't think I am the issue here, Mr Jack. You have refused to look into yourself and see why your passion is locked.”

“What are you talking about? You steal into my town, you steal my audience. You come into my home and steal my costume and you think you are not the issue here?” He tried to not raise his voice.

“Yes, Mr Jack, you are the issue. I heard what happened to you. I heard about the accident. The accident that took your child and wife from you months ago. Since then, people said you stopped making the children laugh.”

“I tried. They just don't find me funny. And that accident has nothing to do with it.”

“It has everything to do with it. Your passion died because you wouldn't be able to perform for your child and make her laugh. The woman who supported your career isn't here anymore. You feel like you have no humor or fun left to give and that is why the children won't laugh, Jack. You need to find it again. The reason why you started performing. And you know, I believe those who die never truly leave us. Who knows? Your family could be up there, looking down, waiting and rooting for you. You just have to revive your passion.”

Jack’s shoulders slumped. What she said hit home. And he realized she spoke the truth. He had been holding all this sadness and guilt in and it had cast a shadow on the excitement and joy he was meant to share.

“Why are you telling me this, Smiley?”

“Because I'm leaving town. For good. I have a mission elsewhere. And I need you to be the Jack you once were. The one kids held in high admiration. Please.

He bowed his head as a tear slid down his cheek. Smiley went silent allowing him the time to grieve. By the time he was done grieving, he looked up but she wasn't there anymore, just his clown costume sitting on the bench. She left so silently, he hadn't heard anything. A cool breeze stirred as the sun started setting. He breathed deeply and exhaled, then stood up. It was time to try again.