Beyond the Fence: Forgotten Neighbors

Since I was a child, I have always been an indoor person, and that is because my parents are the protective type who always care for our safety and protection, even now that I am mature. I stay in a gated house where the silence does not feel awkward but peaceful and alive. Almost all the time, the street is always silent, most people are indoors with their doors closed, and some houses with high fences like mine set boundaries between our homes and even sometimes our hearts also. Some are off to work as early as 6:30 a.m., and everyone is always minding their business. And yes, I do know a couple of people, those I can call family friends and the ones we usually turn up for each other during family celebrations and when needs arise, while the majority are strangers even in the same neighborhood I call home.

This has become a mirror in our world today. We celebrate independence while our privacy is now a treasure, and when someone says, "I am minding my business, I don't want want trouble" we often sees it as wisdom. Yet, it always amazes me sometimes what will happen when all that is demanded from us is to lean on each other for help and support?

An emergency is something that happens all of a sudden because it gives us prior notice. I usually ask myself this question while stepping out or while I am indoors sometimes, assuming i stepped out of the house and something happens? Would I be able to trust or depend on my neighbor for help, or would they be able to rely on me? Well, I can nod my head and say yes to some one to three neighbours even though we barely see but we kinda trust eachother.

Accordingly to my few findings on human psychology, we humans were created in a way to connect with eachother and this was something I witnessed during my 21 days in NYSC camp, I was able to bond easily with people of different cultures which was something really incredibly amazing, but our culture and society tends to weaken this by teaching us on how to separate ourselves in a way that we build long bridges and fences. And I have heard of situations where some people were raised in a neighborhood where everyone behaved like a bloodline. They share things in common, they look after each other, they celebrate with each other, and they get disciplined where need be. Those experience shared together will create a lasting memory that will always give warmth to the heart when ever they remember it but adulthood and I am always busy lifestyle has stolen that bond away.

Now, taking a look at my neighborhood, where there is so much silence, some houses feel isolated just like an island. Yes, peace, silence, and less bothered, which can be dangerous sometimes, because if something happens, that household will be left alone, and looking at it, it is not the big padlocks on our doors that are keeping us safe at times but those we surround ourselves with that show care.

Come to think of things that we can do to bring each other closer: inviting one another to the parties we are doing, sharing that plate of party jollofrice or Amala during festive season, checking up on eachother and asking after one another, greeting one another and exchanging names, Children playing together which creates memories, giving out free time to one another. These things might look small, but you never can say who is in need of that act of humanity, and this is how community trust is slowly built.

Because when all is said and done, when the need for emergencies arises, when we cannot carry the weight all by ourselves, it is not about saying that I am living in a well-fenced gated house, but it is all about who is willing to give us a helping hand all through.

Thank you for reading.

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