Alone Time, Heavy Thoughts, and Survival

Aquarians are known for their independence and their need for quiet time.

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There are moments when we can be social and fully present with everyone, and then suddenly we disappear to be alone. Most times, this doesn’t happen just because we feel like it; it often happens when we are trying to heal from something. It could be anything.

The truth is, we don’t like burdening others with our problems, so we withdraw. And when we are done healing, we come back like nothing ever happened.

During these moments alone, we reflect on our past, present, and future. We think about many things, even unnecessary ones.

Two days ago, my son had a high fever. We weren’t sure if it was teething or something more serious, but his body and head kept getting hot. Not wanting to take any chances, I told his mum to take him to the hospital. Minutes later, I got a call that the doctor said he would need to be admitted.

The mention of admission disrupted my plans for the month because I knew how expensive hospital bills could be. I am on a tight budget, but his life comes first, so there was no other option. I had to let them admit him. He was tested and diagnosed with malaria and sepsis.
They requested a deposit of ₦40,000, which I paid, but that completely ruined my monthly plan. I also had to stay with them at the hospital.

I slept for only two hours, and by midnight I was awake. Both Ryan and his mum were asleep, and that was the perfect moment for my quiet time and new planning.

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My original plan for the month was already ruined by his illness, so I had to start rethinking how we would survive the next month. I also had some ideas, some I noted down, others I discarded.

Alone time is something everyone experiences, whether they like it or not. It can happen when you are about to sleep, and random thoughts start flooding your mind. It can happen at work when you get lost in thought for a few seconds. It can happen anywhere.

People are going through a lot this year, and it is not funny. You will be thinking about how to solve one problem, then another will surface, it gets tiring, but we can't give up, it is now I understand why our fathers sit alone and are moody, at that moment, a lot is going on in their minds...

I just believe whatever everyone is going through right now is going to pass. Tough times don’t last, but tough people do. And always remember, no matter what you lose, you can always start again.

Just call me Burl.
I am a professional gamer, motivational speaker and a crypto enthusiast
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