What I Saw on YouTube Today That I Can't Explain

Today i went on YouTube without a plan. You know how it is: you open something, then the algorithm takes you where it wants, like a crazy tour guide who takes you to places you never asked to go. I just wanted to waste five minutes., quietly drinking my coffee. YouTube decided that i deserved a full-fledged excursion.

First stop: a tennis match with a player i didn't know, but who looked like something out of a comedy. I don't know if he always plays like that or if he was having a bad day, but the man had a special talent: making me laugh without saying anything. Strange movements, involuntary grimaces, balls sent in directions that even geometry can't explain. I spent two minutes wondering if i was watching sports or a sketch.

Second stop: sumo. And here i was stuck. Those Japanese are geological structures, not athletes. Two continents colliding in a small circle, while the audience sits calmly, as if they were watching something normal. I, on the other hand, was watching with wide eyes, trying to understand how two masses of people could move so fast. It's the kind of spectacle you don't see in real life, unless you live in another dimension.

And somewhere between comic tennis and tectonic sumo, i realized that YouTube has a special talent: it shows you things you would never look for, but that grab you. I'm not interested in scores, rankings, statistics. I watch for the oddities that you don't see in real life. For those moments that make no sense, but grab you. For the contrast between "this is serious competition" and "what the hell did I just see."

• I used😊 to have the classic image of Asians in my head: small, fast, slim. Then i stumbled upon sumo and discovered that Japan also has an XXL version — complete with speed and technique.

P.S. — If any Japanese person ever reads this, just know I’m not laughing at you. I’m laughing with you. And mostly at this primitive algorithm that keeps sending me to Japan without a ticket.

YouTube is the only place where you can go from a clown on the court to two Japanese planets pushing each other, in less than 30 seconds. And honestly, i don't even want to explain it. Some things are better when you leave them like that: inexplicable, absurd, perfect in their own way.