Finding Oneself When Love Fades.

We were asked one day in a gathering to explain what is love in our understanding and a guy stood up and said that 'love is stubborn', we all laughed at what he said but he's actually right base on where he is coming from. For this week i would be discussing on marriage and love.

I believe and I know that there are people who are married for years and are still in love with each other, my parent are my always my example they are married for almost 30 years and throughout those years I have only seen them grown better in loving themselves, they might only disagree in one or two things but it has never gone beyond that and my prayers used to be God give me the kind of marriage You gave my parents and even more because what they have is beautiful, my point is before we paint marriage or love indifferent we should have a picture of a successfully and sweet marriage.

If one is married and one year into the marriage you fall out of love with the person then plenty things needs to be considered, you might have liked that person for a reason and that reason is no longer there, the feelings might have been infatuation, maybe lust, maybe some characters you never saw in the person begins to surface and you started getting irritated with that person, all these things would show you that love is not just enough so what one would do in such situation might vary depending on individuals preference and sense of reasoning.

You might me craving to eat jollof rice and so hungry to have it but are you ready to go through the steps of preparing the meal because having the ingredients is not the only requirement, so the question is where you ready for marriage before you got entangled in it, for one to lose interest in his or her partner after marriage is a hard nut to crack because it involves their emotional, one of the steps I would take if I were the one in those shoes is to confirm what I feel to be sure about it then I would check back my psychological involvement that I had before getting married to that person, after cross check all these things the way further for me would be to communicate this discovery to my husband as a woman.

That open discussion might lead to us together weighting the standards of that marriage again, if we still want to give it a try then going to talk to someone about how I feel would be the best thing to do, not just talking to anybody but an experienced person either your parents, your mentors or even a therapist in marriage field, in that process I might want to redefine our marriage goals together, trying to my emotional needs at the moment and what I want to see in my relationship, after going for therapy or talking to an elderly experienced person which at that stage would have pin point some errors in both couple, we would then do some evaluation in our marriage to see if the reason of falling out of love can be worked on or not.

Mostly for people who went through white wedding we consciously said for better for worse, in sickness and health till death do you part, so definitely you weren't expecting the marriage to be all perfect and juicy there must definitely be one or two you would dislike so it's your duty to make it work that's if the other person still want same, and when you marry you didn't just marry the person, you married his or her own family so before considering divorce or a break from the marriage I would think about all those people involved, and because we learn from our failures or set backs, that situation should also be used as a means to discover oneself and turn it into positivity towards ones journey or growth in life.

Love is those sacrifices you are willing to make for that person and marriage tends to sail it officially so marriage is a sweet bitter journey of experience, they higher we go the better and steady we become.
I will drop my mic here, thank you for stopping by and see you next time, I love you all big time 😘👍.

All images used here belongs to me.