Shakespearian Love Sonnet for Beard.

Shall I compare Beard to a summer's day?
Your face replaced by finest pubic hairs.
This message of my love I can't delay.
The beauty of your face a blinding glare.

We can get married in all fifty states.
Will I get down on my knees and beg you?
Will I cook you scrambled eggs and rare steaks?
Deny my love advances and I'm blue.

The carpets match the drapes when you're burnet.
I love a man who has two sets of pubes.
The way you cry at movies makes me wet.
I hope you do not think that I'm a rube.

As long as I can breathe, or eyes can see,
I swear this much, I will marry Beardy.