NOT AGAIN

Today I remembered someone and felt really embarrassed because of something that transpired between us. I'm someone who has always been known to be cool, I'm not always in a rush to jump to conclusions so I don't make mistakes, but there was one time I made a really big mistake and the main mistake I made was thinking I knew it all. Imagine thinking you know something and you boldly act on what you know thinking it was right only for it to blow up right in your face. Yes this was my experience, and it wasn't a pleasant one at all. The only saving grace I had was that a lot of people didn't get to know about it which by the way saved my reputation but at the same time kept me on the low for a long while.

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It started during my early days in the higher institution, although I had just dropped my wayward lifestyle, but there were bits of the attributes I still had in me and one of which was the mindset that I could get any girl I wanted and that made my arrogance get the best of me. The aftermath of that event changed the very core of my existence and was part of the things that made me the kind of man I am today. I used to be that guy that regarded nobody, and even at the point when I dropped my wayward living, it was still difficult not looking down on ladies especially because I've had a lot of experiences with them and thus thought ladies to be generally cheap. Mind you, there are ladies that are really cheap and have no self esteem (And guys too by the way) But now I know it wasn't all.

I had a crush on this girl because I thought she liked me, so I started making advances at her, she was naturally polite but I got the wrong signals and one day when I was talking with her, I proceeded to kiss her. I felt so awkward and embarrassed when she withdrew and told me that was disrespectful which was totally opposite of how I imagined her to feel (Butterflies in her stomach). At that instant I felt cheap and a pervert as well and I wished the ground would open and swallow me because my intentions weren't really disrespectful but my actions however proved otherwise. I apologized to her and we never spoke ever again. But that made me realize that it was possible for a lady to be nice and polite with no strings attached.

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I had been living in a world where being polite meant they wanted something from you and because that was where I came from I thought everyone was that way. I began to go for therapy, changing my mindset to become a better person. Thankfully the lady wasn't someone to kiss and tell, I was already embarrassed at the fact that she saw me as a pervert. We never talked about the incident ever again because I no longer had the courage to face her. But then again it was a valuable lesson I learned that made me see people differently.

THIS IS MY ENTRY INTO THE HIVE REACHOUT CONTEST, (IN COLLABORATION WITH THE INLEO INITIATIVE)