Fear cost something huge

It is known to all that humans are the best creatures on this planet, and there is no doubt about it, but all humans are different and think differently. Instead of being the best creature, they can be afraid of many things or actions. Fear is something that exists for everyone. It’s true that there are many people who are very brave, but they also have something they fear. One of the funny incidents was when I saw a person who was known as the bravest person was actually afraid of an injection. Thoughts and life incidents can create fear for different things or actions.

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Almost everyone has something to fear, and the difference is that many people are not ready to accept it in front of people, but they also know that they fear something. Because of fear people can miss many opportunities and suffer in life and in my case, I was not different either. I am fearful of many things but only for few things I missed many opportunities. And the significant one is the fear of ruining good relations with others. I think you can also relate to it if you have also gone through a similar situation like me and the chances of facing such a thing are quite high.

Since my childhood I have been an obedient kid and I used to follow the so-called ideal standard of people. So, the tag of well behaved, polite, obedient, innocent type things goes with me. Naturally from childhood I used to have good relationships with everyone as I am the ideal type of boy, and everyone likes such ideal one. When I was kid, such a thing gave me good feeling but later I realized that those things started to act like shackles when I started to grow up. So, called good and ideal boy needed to obey others and consider their thoughts.

People, including the close ones, used to have high expectations of me. But with growth I found that there are many things that don’t happen according to my preferences. I have seen that people decide things for me when it should be my personal decision or should be taken after informing me. I know they have taken decisions for me with good intentions but it’s not necessary that the outcome is good for it especially when I don’t like to do so. Even if I didn’t like the actions but I could not deny it also because denying means hurting them as well as their thoughts which I didn’t want to do.

If anyone asks me what’s good about my childhood I think I have not so many things to remember. I feel my childhood seems like white paper and I just followed the ideal rules decided by people. I didn’t rebel at that time for fear of making others sad or angry. You can say I was afraid of speaking out of my mind. Thanks to the fear of making my so-called golden childhood for others are like white paper to me where people only praised me for my good behavior and good output. After a certain time, I came to realize that that abide by the rules made my life boring as there were nothing interesting in my life.

I think I would not change myself unless there were some situations in my life that are actually decided by others and some actions were totally against my opinion. Additionally, someone else would suffer for me. The someone is my little brother. I think I could go on like that, but when I saw, the similar thing is going to repeat with him, I felt bad. He was quite rebellious when things were not on his side. Unfortunately, he used to show instant reaction, and many were turning against him even if he didn’t do anything wrong.

I saw some people don’t restrain themselves to keep things worse for him as he was not ideal kid according to their book. But I was always there by his side. At first, I tried to make him little tolerant but later I when I saw some situations were not right for him and I choose to be bold for him and protect him. I even quarreled with my parents many times for the sake of him when I was something unfair was going to happen when I didn’t speak for myself in the earlier days.

I actually offended some close people to protect him. The reason for my change is my little brother, and it really helped me to come out of the fear of breaking relationship and what others will think. I am thankful to my little brother for becoming the reason for my change and coming out of fear. Now I can actually speak for myself also and I don’t care about anyone when I make a decision for me except my family. Indeed, I missed my childhood, but I am not missing anything at the present and I won’t miss anything or opportunity in the future.