They Pretend A Little Better.

So honestly this is one of those topics that can start a very long debate, see I can’t even remember who I was talking to about it, but the conversation stuck in my head because we were discussing whether people can truly change or if they only adjust their behavior, And the truth is this the more I think about it, the more I feel like an adult doesn’t really change just like that, now if we are talking about a child, thay one is different, Children are still growing,they are still learning, and still forming their character, a child can easily change because their mindset is still very flexible, today they might behave one way, tomorrow they learn something new and they become different, children absorb things around them very quickly, and because of that they can grow out of certain habits or attitudes with time.

But when it comes to an adults, hmm… that one is a different story entirely, by the time someone becomes an adult, they have already built their personality over many years, their beliefs, habits, and way of thinking have already settled in one way or another, that is why you will hear people say things like “this is just how I am.” It is not always said out of pride, sometimes it is just the reality of how deeply certain traits are rooted in someone, from what I have seen, most adults do not truly change who they are deep inside, what they mostly do is adjust their behavior depending on the situation they are in, for example, someone who is naturally impatient may learn to act more calm in public because they know it’s expected of them, someone who has a hot temper might learn to control it at work because they don’t want to lose their job, but deep down, that trait might still be there, so sometimes it looks like someone has completely changed, but in reality they have just learned how to manage or hide certain behaviors better, that is why you will sometimes see situations where a person behaves very differently in different environments, In one place they appear very calm and reasonable, and in another place their real personality suddenly shows.

That doesn’t necessarily mean people are bad or fake, it just means human beings are complicated, of course, I am not saying adults cannot improve themselves, people can definitely grow, become more mature, and learn from their experiences, life itself teaches many lessons that can shape how someone behaves over time, but changing your behavior is not always the same thing as changing who you are at the core, Sometimes what really happens is that adults learn how to control themselves better, they become more aware of their actions, they reflect on their mistakes, and they try to do better moving forward, that kind of growth is very real and very important.

But if we are talking about completely transforming into a totally different person overnight, I honestly don’t think it works that way, in many cases, adults don’t suddenly become different people, they just learn how to present themselves differently depending on the situation, And sometimes, what looks like change from the outside is simply someone learning how to pretend a little better.

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2 comments

It really is a serious topic.. personally, i dont believe people change. I believe they only become aware. And that awareness leads to some kind of eye opening.

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People just become aware. And yes the awareness leads to an eye opening of some sort

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Great perspective you’ve got there. Only a few people are willing to take the step to change in and out. But the larger majority just try to mask everything under the pretense on being changed people.

But then again, if you’re ready to walk the talk, I believe change is a possibility.

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