The Value of Adversity and The Importance of Grit

A large percentage of us would have at one point in time or another looked at our parents and wished they were richer than they're, or paraventure even envisioned ourselves being born into the home of some of the richest men and wondering how our lives would have turned out without all the challenges we've come across. However, we can't still help but sometimes be grateful for some of the challenges we encountered in our journey because they're what went on to brood our resilience and shape the person we're today. Notwithstanding, we still look at our lives and strive to make everything available for them so they won't undergo the same challenges we did in order to give them a more pleasant life.

I understand everyone, including me, has gone through hell and back in trying to survive and making a life for ourselves, making sure we can push ourselves into a status where we're comfortable financially, materially, and in every other aspect more than our parents could ever achieve. Aside from the fact that chasing all of these makes our own lives easier, it's also with the motive to do better to our children than our parents did for us, and that's a good course if I must say, but does it make sense if we entirely provide for all their needs to the point where their lives become entirely easier and seamless?

Personally, I must say that I want the best for my children. I want them to have the best of everything, making sure they don't experience most of the sufferings and challenges I underwent because I knew how depressing and tiring that can be, knowing fully well that I only sail through all of those by his grace, so in order to change the narrative, if I've got all the resources available, I'll definitely not want them to go through what I went through, especially in terms of challenges.

But that doesn't mean I'll always give them everything they want or need at all times. There's this proverb in Yoruba that says, 'omo ti a ko ko ni yo gbe ile ti a ko ta' meaning that a child we refuse to teach or build will go on to eventually destroy the house we've built, and in my opinion and understanding of that proverb, I believe teach and build in that context could also be associated with training or allowing them to undergo some form of test and challenge to brood their experience and challenges that would help them deal with the real world when we're gone and not there to cater for their needs or guide their path.

A real-life occurrence that best depicts that proverb I share above was the story of the life of the founder of Diamond Bank, Pascal Dozie, and his son, Uzoma Dozie, the former CEO of the bank. When Uzoma Dozie was 30, his father had given him the wheel of Diamond Bank to operate as the CEO. Loads of questions were even raised as of that time because the son was a chemist, so how can you saddle him with the responsibility of running a financial institution?

Well, to cut a long story short, Diamond Bank under Uzoma went from being among the top 10 banks in Nigeria to begin on the verge of folding up until they're acquired by the late Herbert Wigwe, who was tend the CEO of Access Bank. The slide of Diamond Bank from the top down to rock bottom indicates the absence of experience in that field for Uzoma Dozie, who paraventure never faced any challenges in the financial world prior to being given the CEO of a bank, and the way the bank crashed highlights some of the role challenges play in our lives regardless of how bad we see them.

So with that being said, in my opinion and as I wish to raise my children, while I'll want them to have the best of education, materials, and the like and not suffer the same fate as I did, that doesn't mean I won't let them undergo challenges. To the best of my capability, I'll put them in different fields and test their ability to overcome challenges, which will go on to aid their problem-solving skills and critical thinking ability to sail through tough times.

Doing this isn't because I'm strict or wicked, but for their own good, and also so they won't squander what I spend my life laboring for and ultimately going broke, but with evidence of challenges that increases their lives experience, they'll know how to navigate their ways out of challenges even in my absence. 'Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it', says Proverbs 22:6, and on that note will I bring this piece to a close.

---

All photos are taken and edited on canva.

---