Weighed Options: Ensuring Elderly Care In This Era

At the community I am serving, we heard the news about the death of one old man that the description given made everyone recognized who had died... "That old man that always pushes and uses his bicycle to walk to and fro his farm everyday on the road". I can't even express just how sad I get whenever I saw the man struggle with his bad leg and his bad bicycle back home.

I wish I knew a way to help but nothing could be done from my end that would relieve his struggles as I heard the legs had gone bad for so many years and he had no children to take care of him. He had to cater for himself in the most little way (farming) until he died. Even after his death, it was a quiet and quick burial as he didn't have much for himself, no much relatives too.

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In a case like his, I wish someone had taken the responsibility since a long time ago to send him to a retirement home but then, we can't blame anyone as it is mostly what children can do for their aged parents, not strangers except they are philanthropists mostly. When it comes to caring for the elderly ones, there are the options to be weighed and considered best for each family.

The older people need as much care as little child do and it is the responsibility of the children to care for their older parents whether by themselves or they spend their money for professionals to do the job. In any way that works, the priority should be that they are well taken care of. Where I come from, I doubt there are much older people in the retirement homes.

This is because, most aged people are taken care of at home by their children or they are abandoned to live by themselves because their children got too busy with life and they refused to go live in the city with them. While it isn't easy to care for the aged ones, it's much easier when it is done by their loved ones and with the mind of creating last memories and moments for them.

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Personally, my family has two elderly people who we have to weigh options in making sure they have good enough care as they age even more. My only grandma alive from my mum's side and my family's eldest aunt who is like a grandma to us from my dad's side. There are others aging so fast too like our eldest uncle and second eldest aunts but they are still in the working level.

From what I know as a grandchild, they are being taken care of but from a far distance. What I mean is, they have refused to join most of their children in the city or to live with their new family. My grandma will say "I can't leave my farmlands, nobody will care for them when I'm away" forgetting that she will die someday and leave them if she isn't taken care of by her children.

Some aged people want to keep living in their hometown and not even in a retirement home. Weighing the options, I would prefer to make sure they have enough money to get whatever they want and limit the workload they have to do. I'll also make sure to visit as often as I can to help check their health, listen to them and laugh with them, my grandma enjoys having us around.

So if money isn't an issue, I believe we don't have to be always present to care for our aged ones but we can't abandon them totally, it's an option that shouldn't even be considered. They deserve and should receive our care. What do you think?

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6 comments

I think why your granny doesn't want to leave the village is because she's strongly connected to it. That's likely where the key memories of their live were made. Staying there allows them still hold on to the memories, and their old lives. Also, for old people, it's generally more difficult to pick up their entire lives and move to new places.

I agree with your conclusion. We don't have to be there to care for them, and we definitely don't need to put them in a retirement home. What matters is that we ensure they're comfortable and taken care of, wherever they are.

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Yeah, I think same too. She had all her kids there and have all her assets there too.

It's the best way really!

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The problem with some of the old is they are already used to their lifestyle wherever they are, even if their children offer to take them with them, they don't consent to it.

But you made a very good point, even if they refused to stay with you as their child because they don't want to abandon their farms, as they often say, we can make a responsibility to always make our presence available and also supply their needs, it will ease the burden for them and make them feel loved.

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Yeah, that's just it.
Abadoning them should never be in the option.

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They took care of us when we didn't even know what life was like. They held our hands and helped us navigate life just so we won't fall, and when we did fall, they helped us dust off dirt so we could try again, so the best we can do is to make sure they have a good life in their old age. To ensure they enjoy their last days on earth, no matter how far or how close it might be.

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Your comment reminds me of the song "Kids" by Sasha sloan a song about parents becoming kids 🥹

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There is not doubt that our elders deserve our care as long as they are our well wisher. In fact, I think it's the responsibility to take care of elder person of the child. They can't give finance to us but I think there are many other thing they can give us even if they don't make money.

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You're right, and it's not like we should expect anything in return from them aside aging beautifully

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Sorry about the tragic accident of old man! Life comes with many tragedies, we need to care about them. Yeah, there is no one who will be happy even in professional home care. They all wait for their family untill they died.

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Yeah, thanks
May his soul rest well.
That's right.

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