A SENSE OF PEACE

If there is one thing that has given me joy in recent times, it is the fact that I am now debt free. Although for the few bills here and there, the realization that I have risen above what nearly took my life last year is settling in me so deeply and making me understand that indeed I am way more capable than I imagined. This is not out of arrogance, but out of the fact that I survived that storm, and if I could survive the storm, I can survive anything with faith and God on my side. I guess everything I have gone through recently has also made me find peace in my religion and faith. This isn’t born out of the things I was taught in church, but out of the things I survived in real life. I guess it is just the peace that comes with knowing you are doing the right thing and that peace is what gives me joy the most.

Photo by Colton Duke on Unsplash

I remember how my heart was always in my throat last year because a lot of things were going wrong in my life and all I wanted to do was end everything. I was in a really bad place and one could even say I was mentally unstable because everything going wrong affected me mentally. Coming out of everything wasn’t easy, but I managed to do it little by little and I am here today out of it all. The joy of knowing that there was a time I did not have this peace is so refreshing. I can sleep in my house not scared of whether anyone would walk in to arrest me. The joy of being able to take care of my family and friends and have a little to give out can not be underestimated. This might look like the little things, but the truth is I never had that a year ago.

Going forward all I want to do is maintain this peace and this joy, I do not want anything that would jeopardize what I have currently. Trying to keep my head down and grow at my own pace. This does not mean I am no longer ambitious, I have just learned enough that I know in order to maintain the peace I have I need to take things slow and try as much as possible to make do with whatever I have. This is more like a healing stage for me, and I am just happy to be at peace which is a stage of my healing. It would be too early to start taking risks that would jeopardize the peace I have now. I just want to live, breathe a breath of fresh air and enjoy my sanity. To be honest I now prioritize this above all, and when I see anyone and anything trying to invade or spoil what I have, I just avoid them with everything I have in me. This is me choosing my peace of mind.

THIS IS MY RESPONSE TO HIVE LEARNER'S PROMPT FOR WEEK 208 EPISODE 2