A GOD KIND OF LOVE

People tend to see me as a loverboy, but the truth is, I am not even trying to be one, rather I am learning to break out of my shell and show the kind of love that is beyond comprehension. This is not just romantic, but even in my way of life and truth is that when I show certain people (ladies especially) such love, it tends to backfire as they now become overly emotional. However, they do not know that I just want to express this kind of love to everyone I meet. Most of the time though I am very shy, but when I get the opportunity I tend to just overcome that part of myself and become loveable. I think this is the major reason I have a good relationship with everyone in my work place. I am always ready to give as long as I have and it is not even about money, but time and resources. I do this because there was a time I deeply hurt someone who showed me nothing but love, I have not seen her since then, I do not know if I will ever see her again, but I try to use every opportunity I get to show my world the love I could not give her.

Photo by Emmanuel Phaeton on Unsplash

This love is kinda tricky, a lot of times people tend to think they can play on my intelligence but do not know I am not even doing it for them but for me. I want to be like a paragon of love and that is why I do the things I do. I want to be able to show so much love to people that if they refuse it it would be like it broke me, in the past I have been broken because of this, I gave too much and I was paid back in thorns. But one thing about this love is that it does not just forgive, it forgets also. It took everything in me to forgive those that hurt me. Now that I look back, I have forgotten about it and am just trying to show more love. For every time I was broken I have managed to come back strong, and this isn’t even about relationships, but friendships with really strong bonds. The more I learn about this kind of love the more I see the flaws in myself and work on it. I think this is why God has blessed me with a few great friends who tend to love me without wanting anything in turn, and even though I am no longer in touch with most of them, their impact in my life still speaks to me till date.

At the moment, I am being misunderstood by a new colleague at my office who interpreted this kind of love romantically and is now trying to be romantic with me LOL. Unfortunately I have learned to love with my emotions in check, she was disappointed when I started withdrawing. She thinks I am playing with her feelings, but I was just being nice. I have noticed that a lot of us did not grow up in an environment of love, so we find it difficult to reciprocate it without emotions. I mean it is completely okay for someone to perform an act of service or buy you gifts or even say words of affirmation to you without wanting anything in return, for me the blessing is in the smile I see when I have done it, and it is enough for me. I wish to express this love to the orphans and beggars one day. The thought of it scares and excites me at the same time, but I believe it is achievable.

THIS IS MY RESPONSE TO HIVE LEARNER'S
PROMPT FOR WEEK 206 EPISODE 2