Not Too Close, Not Too Distant: The Neighborly Balance
In every compound full of tenants, there are different kinds of tenants you will see there. We have gossipers, borrowers, overly friendly individuals, those who are aloof, smokers, a violent couple, and tenants at loggerheads, always at each other's throats. Just name it, but this also depends on the kind of compound.
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I have lived in Face Me I Face you and the Elite compound, so I know how people who live in both act.
Your Neighbour is neither your friend nor your enemy. Keep things balanced by not being too close and not too distant. Greeting my neighbors is my way of passing the message that all is well between us.
When it comes to dealing with Neighbors, do not start what you can't finish, and one of the things I advise you should not do is borrow things from your neighbor
In my new apartment, my neighbour placed their washing machine outside, so when my partner saw it, she was like We should tell them to let us make use of it and I refused immediately because I don't like being indebted to neighbors, the moment you start borrowing their things, be sure they would borrow from you when they need it and we have some people that all they need is that opportunity which you create by asking them for something... It could result in you borrowing one thing from them, and they will borrow 10 things from you, and the moment you stop lending them or stop them from using your things, you become enemies. Imagine having enemies living in the same compound with you...
So I told her no way and bought our own weeks later, this is something I should have gotten, but because there was no space to keep it in my former apartment was what stopped me...
Another thing I advise against is gossiping with your neighbors; ... If you are the type that sits around with your neighbor, see finish go enter ya matter as you are discussing about other neighbour, your matter will be discussed too when you leave, don't just be too close with your neighbor because things like this leads to sharing secrets and there is no way to avoid misunderstanding, that is when you will hear your biography being broadcasted to the whole house by the neighbour.
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Being too close also give them access to ask you for things easily which is not right, I went out one day and when I came back, my partner already had a gist waiting for me, so it happened that two guys living downstairs were discussing and one of them was complaining about Network Ish and he was like who is the person using the 5g Airtel Network that is always on and the other one pointed at my apartment, my babe was seeing them but they can't see her. Assuming I was close with them, they would have begged me to connect to my Router. Yeah, it cost me nothing since it is unlimited, but it can be dangerous, especially if those guys are into something shady that could implicate me, since they are using my Public IP address.
I am the aloof kind of neighbor; I am always on my own, and the only thing that connects me to my neighbor is greetings, but this does not mean I do not help them when necessary or when the need arises.
Sometimes when we are on Gen and the NePA brings light, and I am the first person to reach where the Gen is, I will switch off all the Gen that is on there and also turn off the fuel leak. Little help like this is needed from a Neighbour, and I do this.
If my neighbor needs my help, I am ready to help as long as it doesn't become an everyday thing, because that is no longer help and it has become a sort of entitlement thing, which I won't condone.
So definitely yes! I would so much love a neighbour like myself.
No pokenosing in my neighbour's affairs, no gossip, no fight, and ready to help if the need arises.
Just call me Burl.
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I think I love the way you keep things at balance with your neighbor, everything should just have limit because humans can be humans . If you maintain a certain level of relationship , it makes sense especially in time we need our neighbors to come true for us
I have had midnite health crises with with my child and a neighbor rushed us to the hospital with his car
I have had midnite health crises with with my child and a neighbor rushed us to the hospital with his caryou get it akonam. Help like this is the reason why we should not be enemies with our neighbor, because we do not know when we may need them for things like the one you mentioned. It could be other little things, like helping us to pack the clothes we sundry when it wants to rain.
Balanced strategy is good and works well. But it also depends on the nature of your neighbour and of course the nature of our selves. My experience with my neighbour is like my family members, but yes I also restrict to borrowing items in general.
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Not too close and not too distant is not pride, that's how it should be.
Some neighbors can be too funny, and getting closer to them can be a downfall.
Thanks for this @burlarj
I was almost a victim of this "see finish" because I was closer to a particular neighbor because we spoke same language but when I realize my closeness was leading to another thing, had to distance myself.