One Wrong Move
Relationships have been on my mind a lot lately. They are quite fragile things and they are also open to a lot of interpretation from both sides. I've had people come in and out of my life many times through the years, but some seem to hurt a little more than others. One of the things that has really been tugging at me lately in terms of relationships is just how close they can be to falling apart. Like I said, they are fragile, one wrong move and what used to be something you cherished is now something that bring uncertainty, heartbreak, and sometimes even dread.
My friend @a4xjeeper went out for fish again this past weekend. As I have mentioned before, it's the Lenten season and though we don't specifically celebrate that mostly Catholic tradition, we do like to get out and try some of the local fish fries that the midwest is well known for. In this case, we headed to a place that we tried to visit a week ago only to arrive and find out they had sold out of fish.
As you can see, we had much better luck this past weekend. We got three pieces of Cod along with some coleslaw, a cornbread muffin, and fries all for about $20. You might think three pieces of fish isn't enough, but with the beer batter, it definitely filled you up. I have decided that I prefer lightly breaded perch over beer batter cod, but this was still really good for he price.
Sadly, our schedules are not going to work out for us to hit any more fish fries this year, but that's just how it goes.
Additionally, the relationship with my friend is just fine in case you were worried. It's actually a different relationship that has been on my mind a lot lately.
I'm not going to get into a ton of details, but @mrsbozz has been going through a rough patch with one of her friends right now. A long time friend that in turn had become a close friend of mine as well. It's at the point where we all know things can never be the way they were, but we are also unsure how things move forward from here. Just trust me when I say it's a hot mess, with a bit of confusion and a lot of heartbreak thrown in.
I hate to see my wife going through this, and since the two of us have a pretty small friend group as it is, a loss like this just hits a little harder if that makes sense. I honestly think my wife is handling it a lot better than I am. Either that or she just hides it better.
This actually fits in with HIVE, and a thought I had the other day while I was talking to someone on Discord about the blockchain. It occured to me that a relationship with HIVE is a fragile thing just like anything else. You are really just one mistake or one misunderstanding away from everything you have worked for over the years to suddenly be gone. Sure, you might still have your tokens or your HP, but if the votes stop coming or the engagement, what do you have left at that point?
If you are just using HIVE as a way to journal, then I guess it isn't that big of a deal, but I think one of the things that makes HIVE so useful is the interaction you get from other people on the chain. Then of course there is the fiscal point of view. If this isn't something that you can even make a few pennies on via a passive income, is it worth it? For some the answer might be yes. For others and as we have seen countless times through the years, the answer is no. Sadly, I am sure we haven't seen the last of people powering down and leaving the platform altogether.
On the flip side, if you have to walk around on eggshells and not be your true self, is it really worth it? What happens when that connection is no longer there? Either from just one side or both sides?
While I try to be an empathetic person, that only goes so far, and as we have seen quite clearly these days, you can't chain someone's mind if they already have it made up about something.
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Relationships can be hard to maintain. Sometimes friends are lost for many reasons…distance, fights, not sharing the same interests anymore. I definitely understand how tough it can be when this happens… it’s hard to keep the connection when one side loses interest, and you definitely notice. In my case, it’s happened both ways… but I must say, I never looked at Hive this way before… and you are right…just a small misunderstanding. I use it as my way of relief, like a journal, yes. But it would still be bad if there weren’t any more readers for my posts. I love talking about what I write, and there’s no point in being fake…I mean…what’s the point of writing then?
Everything happens for a reason, so… Mr. and Mrs. stay strong!
Thanks, I appreciate it. I think it wouldn't be quite so hard if our friend circle was bigger, but when it is so small to begin with when you lose one or two, it becomes even harder. Plus these friends were like family, so that makes the potential loss even more severe.
I hope that the friendship can be mended. But I totally get it. I’ve had many friends over my many years on this earth. They’ve come and gone. Things change, people move, interests change, life happens. I have a very small circle of friends. I like it that way. I’m a very direct unfiltered person. I don’t waste time on bullshit, time is too valuable to me. I like having fun and doing things, I’ve worked too hard and too long not to.
As far as the blockchain I’ve made a handful of really good friends here. I’ve met up with several of them and I’m actually meeting up with another this summer in California. I went and visited Summertooth and Dfinney last year in Oregon. We had a great time and got to share Crater Lake and the Oregon coast together. If friendship is that fragile it’s not a friendship, eggshells is not friendship.
!pimp
Very good points! It will be interesting to see how things move forward from here. I hope it can all mend in one way or another.
Relationships are indeed fragile. Normally the longer the relationship exists the more robust it is.
I did loose one of my best friends, just pure based on distance. We grew up together, played football, tennis, were each other best mans and still this relationship doesn't exists anymore. Nothing was said, nothing was done, we just grew apart. When you look back, the weekly phone calls are skipped from time to time, then it turns more in a monthly call, up to a point that you just give up and he probably did the same.
Here on Hive there can be indeed a lot of drame. I just try to avoid that, but I will be just me. Take it or leave it.
Yeah, I would have thought that, but it's crazy how circumstances can change things. It's still just really sad to know that something that you thought was going to be forever has changed or is maybe gone completely.
That's a tough one when it's someone you've been friends with for a long time. We've had those seasons of friendships that come and go and while it's not always something dramatic that fractures the relationship, it still can be painful. Sometimes its just life timing, jobs, kids, change of interests or other. Recently just had one make a full circle where someone we were close friends with, who then ebbed out of being quite as close, to back to being somewhat close friends again. It's odd how that happens sometimes.
That's my hope is that somehow we can get back to that point again. It might not be the same as it was, but to at least have that connection again. It might just take some time I guess.
I feel like with how polarized people are nowadays and social media and how crazy politics and religion can be people are just one comment away from ending relationships.
Its unfortunate, sorry you guys are going through that
Thank you and yes, I agree with that. Things are just so volatile.
I think this is not really true, you can recover from most mistakes here. There are reasonable people here who would plead your case if there is a misunderstanding.
From experience, people that "lost" everything did not lose it because they did one mistake or one misunderstanding. They did a mistake, maybe a misunderstanding, but then doubled down on that mistake and continued to double down each time.
That is a good point. It's still something I have been considering though.
Good to hear things are well with the friend you eat fish with. Too bad your schedules didn't jive to do it more. Understand about the other friend you and your wife share. My wife andI are the same. We have a small circle as well and it is becoming smaller. So I understand what you say about how it hurts when a friendship doesn't work out anymore. We are kind of losing a friend we have had for many years. Not sure how it has happened, but we are just drifing apart. There are many reasons for it and I won't go into it here, but it no matter it still hurts.
As far as Hive. I have been thining a great deal on that lately. I have been trying to expand who I engage with and cutting some off. As far as votes, they are cool and all, but more interested in engagement.
That is a good point, expanding your circle is probably not a bad thing, but here just like in real life it can be hard. I am sorry you guys are going through that. I hope it all works out for all of us.
I do too.
Votes come and go, you can't control them, but relationships are a different thing. However, people change in time and you can't change them back, so losing good friends happen as well. It's sad, but when you get to a point where the damage is greater than the good things, better let go.
Yeah, I just hope if it gets to the point of letting go we are making space for someone new. If that never happens, it's going to be a lonely existence.