Healing From Within: Navigating Forgiveness And Self-Love

Let me start with a short story, an elder woman in a neighborhood I once lived in had almost nothing to do with anyone in the neighborhood. She was always on her own, I thought she was a bit haunty and scary so as a child, I tried to stay far from her wherever I saw her. Later, I learnt she had kept enmity with almost everybody around.

At that time, I didn't understand why the adults stayed away from her but I saw how she grew leaner every time I get to see her, she was never happy and her face looked so sad with no hope of any smile. She looked so unkempt until her death. The neighbours were saying that it was the spirit of unforgiveness in her that killed her.

As much as we can't make others stop offending us, we can help ourselves by living free regardless of who is offending us, no matter the number of times. It's a hard, very difficult but it's very possible to live free and happy even when people are bent on frustrating your forgiveness spirit. The woman chose a wrong path on that.

Forgiveness for me, is a part of life and almost an everyday exercise. Humans can not do without forgiveness but there are levels of being forgiving. They say, forgive and forget but we can not deny that some things are unforgettable except our memories fail us due to old age or health issues. So we have to focus on forgiving.

As a person, I can confidently say I am the forgiving kind. And I know it's because I can't bear to keep something in my mind for too long, I tend to forgive even when the person doesn't ask for it. This is because from my experience, I've learned that I only harm myself within when I refuse to forgive regardless of whatever actions.

Although from others experiences, there are quite some wrongs people commit that seem unforgivable and it's understandable to an extent how it can take time to forgive such but it's always my advice and prayer for such people in a situation like that, that they forgive regardless but don't forget and live a better as they learn from it.

As for self love, forgiving others and yourself when you do wrong to others is also part of loving yourself because we do know how unhappy we can get when we have something weighing us down emotionally or otherwise. I am one who prioritise self love, it's not because I learnt it growing up, but I know it's importance.

Nobody will teach you self love better than you will learn yourself because you have realized that nobody will love you better than you will love yourself. They say we should love our neighbours as we love ourselves, we can't achieve that if we do not love ourselves first. The first step I have learned to loving myself is accepting who I am.

The world is big with so many people and we often see those better than us, the ability to accept your flaws and strength is a big step to showing yourself that deserving love. Don't wait for another to appreciate you, instead use that energy to build on your strength and limit your flaws to become a better version of yourself.