RE: Sam’s Hangout #114 - “PARENTS AND UNSPOKEN FEELINGS”

Happy weekend, guys 🎉

Lemme not beat around the bush and contribute my 50cent to this matter..

First off, as a child I'm a little bit different from others, I mean I was never the type to shush my mouth except if I don't just want to, so I definitely have things I didn't say out up till now, but me not saying it means it's not important. Yes, not as if I talk to them somehow, no. I'm a very respectful child as well, and I respect my parents so much, so when I don't feel comfortable with a thing, I call them and I voice it out respectfully.

I've spoken to my mum and dad about things they probably never expected to hear from me, maybe they felt it should have come from my older siblings and such, but when it seems they (my older siblings) don't want to talk or just felt comfortable with it, I say it out. I just believe so much is communication, conversations, and honest discussions.

And for this few things I haven't say out yet, I'm not sure I will, the fact that I haven't said it out means I can handle it or I've just made peace with it and can let go or allow it. I'm sure you understand me. It's not because I'm afraid to speak...nah.

About if I become a parent today, own of the things I will even work towards, which I'm already doing is to become the kind of parent a child feels safe to tell anything. There's something about being a parent a child can come to freely to discuss their issues, fears, pressures, and all with.
I've not been here for long, but for the little time I've spent here, I can see the obvious changes on our society. The pressures and all that children are facing today are the type almost every parent never faced while they were growing up.

And children will always talk and open up when they are excited, scared, confused, or even in trouble, they will always talk, so it depends on the kind of relationship you have with them. So, they either tell you or find someone else to talk too. I'm always around kids, and countless times have I heard stuffs, guess what, at the end of the day you will see this children telling me, "don't tell my mummy o. " And it speaks volumes. They knew there parents will never handle it they way I did, they knew they my might regret it if their parents ever knew.

Also, in as much as we can say a child should open up and all, even if the parents were always there for them doing things the right way, children will still and will always have their secrets. It is just a natural part of growing up. A child won't divulge to you every single thing, the most important thing is just that make sure you're the type of parent that what your child is hiding from you isn't stuffs they are maybe struggling with, make sure you're the kind of parent they can always walk up to, so that whatever they decide to not let out will be things that don't count, things that even if you later know about... It's nothing.

My own children will know that they can tell me about anything and I wouldn't handle it the way they won't like. There's something about being an understanding parent. Children will fail, they will be scared, they will make mistakes, and all, it's left for us to know how best to handle situations and give them a listening ear, not to judge, not to argue, not to shout at them, but to listen to really listen (understand).

Thank you for your attention to this matter 🫡.

@afrikens
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🎤