Absolutely Ridiculous!

When I looked at the prompt topics of the week, I just knew a konk Nigerian was behind it because there is no way you would be here and not heard one ridiculous superstition or story as a child. I have heard many and I had believed many. Until, I believed no more...

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I can not emphasize how much rubbish I have heard. Especially those related to tradition and the likes. Not that I am against it but they are so ludicrous if you ask me and why I don't engage in many cultural lectures. I have limits now to what I believe compared to when I was a child.

I can't remember at what age I heard as a child that if I step on someone's spittle, that person would have a sore throat. I remember how my little mind wandered why and how that'll happen. I had asked some of my mates to try it but no one was brave enough to be a scape goat. And then I heard the part of the chicken shit...

I was sitting outside with a few candies Mom bought for me (showing off as usual) when a scream pierced my ears. It was Mary and her younger brother Alfred who were in a fight and Alfred happened to leave quite the mark with his teeth. Mary slapped him so hard I could swear he saw stars and proceeded to say she'd apply chicken shit.

Alfred took a 360 immediately and began to plead with her to forgive him. I walked over to them and asked (nosey me) why he was scared of chicken shit. Mary was smiling while Alfred's face was covered in snot and tears from crying so hard. Mary told me that rubbing chicken shit on a bit mark would leave the perpetrator's teeth decayed. So, you can imagine how I got when I was in Alfred's position sometime later.

One other stupid theory I have heard is the...shadow catch. One point in my life, I was scared of death by my shadow. This was because I believed that I would die if someone were to step on my shadow. Looking back at my childhood, I should be disappointed at how gullible I was. I would walk trying to hide my shadow (like that was possible). I would try to maneuver my movements and would feel my fear multiply when people would still step on "me".

And then the most stupid one that I don't even know how it came about - the garden. I was told by a mate of mine that swallowing orange seed would make it grow in my stomach.

"Wouldn't I die?!" I asked in horror.

"Yes naw. That is why you must make sure never to swallow orange seed."

Wahala!

The kind of things I believed in my childhood ehn... E still dey shock me. How can a tree grow in my tummy for goodness sake?

Should we bring up Nigerian mothers telling their daughters that if a boy as much as touches them, they get pregnant?

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My Mom was also guilty of that. I spent many weeks worried that I was pregnant. And I will not forget how she laughed at me when I went to 'confess' my sins. I never understood why she wasn't slapping me like I see in Nigerian films but I later understood when I was old enough to understand what sex is.

As for the chicken shit, I was set straight through the evidence of science itself. That explanation was just not logical. The teeth mark has no root to the bitten object. It's just like saying that when the remnant of an apple rots, the person who ate would have his teeth fall off. See? It's just stupid.

That was how I came to the conclusion of the orange seed too. Especially when I properly understood the use of soils and the various types, the planting processes and also asking my Agric teacher if it would happen. His hard laughter was all I needed to hear. As for the shadow thing, I am not dead. I just got tired of caring honestly. So, I let it go and totally forgot about the whole ordeal until this moment.

This is my response to the HiveNaija Prompt Topic by the HiveNaija Community. I look forward to reading the many stories. I just have a feeling mine is child's play compared to what my Lagosians, Ibomites, Kadashians and the likes have to say on this topic😆.

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