SECRET N° 330 The Shell Wars 14

Chapitre 14 : La Guerre des Rumeurs

(Où le silence devient suspect, les champignons dénoncent tout le monde, et les grenouilles entrent en campagne de désinformation)

TENSION DANS LA CANOPÉE
Le lendemain, plus aucun animal ne faisait confiance à personne.

Les écureuils enterraient leurs noisettes… dans d'autres arbres.

Les hérissons se roulaient en boule dès qu’un papillon éternuait.

Même Speedo avait commencé à parler à sa coquille :
— « Tu me dirais si t’étais une taupe infiltrée, hein ? »

Castagnor, lui, tentait de maintenir l’ordre avec un mégaphone fait d’écorce :

— « CE N’EST PAS PARCE QUE VOTRE VOISIN RENIFLE QU’IL COMPLOTE ! »

Mais personne ne l’écoutait. Parce qu’une rumeur disait que le mégaphone était enchanté par des lémuriens télépathes.

L’ATTAQUE DES FAUSSES NOUVELLES
Pluminette la pie, experte en ragots mais aussi en vérité manipulée, annonça :

— « Le Rumeron diffuse désormais ses rumeurs via… les spores. »

— « Les… spores ? » demanda Belladonna, méfiante.

— « Oui. Des champignons infectés qui propagent des mensonges à chaque expiration. Il suffit d’un éternuement… et pouf : tout le monde pense que Speedo dirige un culte des limaces. »

— « C’EST FAUX ! » cria Speedo.

Un silence.

— « Mais… je les respecte. Voilà tout. »

LE CONTRE-COUP DE COM
Pour riposter, Castagnor lance la première campagne anti-rumeur officielle :

Des pancartes : “Un bon ragot vaut un bon bâillon.”

Des tampons officiels : “Validé par le Conseil des Honnêtetés”

Des tatouages temporaires pour prouver sa fiabilité (en écorce biodégradable)

Belladonna crée un groupe de décodeurs de rumeurs, composé de hiboux très sérieux, de lombrics paranoïaques, et d’un castor qui ne dit jamais rien (donc très fiable).

Mais le Rumeron frappe plus fort.

Il invente des scandales :

Jean-Rasoir aurait brûlé un calendrier païen.

Pluminette cacherait des noix dans des nids frauduleux.

Castagnor… serait en fait un pigeon infiltré sous stéroïdes.

Le chaos s’installe.

LE RUMERON EST UN GÉNIE (UN PEU TROP)
Le Rumeron, juché sur un trône de journaux froissés, rit :

— « Tant que les mots brûlent, je n’ai même pas besoin de feu ! »

Mais à force de trop parler, il se piège lui-même.

Il prétend que les grenouilles préparent un coup d’état… et il le dit… devant un chœur de grenouilles… très bien armées.

LA RÉVÉLATION ET LA CHUTE
Les grenouilles, vexées, capturent le Rumeron dans un bocal à confiture vide.
Castagnor l’interroge :

— « Pourquoi ? POURQUOI ? »

Le Rumeron ricane :

— « Parce qu’avec une bonne rumeur… on peut commander un royaume sans couronne. »

Belladonna résume :

— « C’est un pigeon. Mais sociopathe. »

FIN D’UN CHAPITRE BRUYANT
Le calme revient, lentement.

Mais la confiance a été sérieusement écorchée.
On ne regarde plus un champignon de la même façon.

Speedo installe un détecteur de ragots (qui siffle à chaque mensonge). Il explose instantanément.

Jean-Rasoir propose une solution radicale :
— « ON INTERDIT LES MOTS ! »

— « Jean… dors un peu. »

Chapter 14: The War of Whispers

(Where silence becomes suspicious, mushrooms rat everyone out, and frogs launch a disinformation campaign.)

TENSION IN THE TREETOPS
The next day, no animal trusted anyone anymore.

Squirrels buried their acorns... in other animals’ trees.

Hedgehogs rolled into balls anytime a butterfly sneezed.

Even Speedo had started talking to his shell:
— “You’d tell me if you were a mole infiltrator, right?”

Meanwhile, Castagnor tried to restore order using a bark-made megaphone:

— “JUST BECAUSE YOUR NEIGHBOR SNIFFLES DOESN’T MEAN HE’S PLOTTING!”

But no one listened. Because a rumor claimed the megaphone had been enchanted by telepathic lemurs.

THE FAKE NEWS OFFENSIVE
Pluminette the magpie, expert in gossip and truth-bending, warned:

— “The Rumeron is now spreading falsehoods through... spores.”

— “Spores?” asked Belladonna, skeptical.

— “Yes. Infected mushrooms releasing lies with every breath. One sneeze... and poof — everyone thinks Speedo runs a slug-worshipping cult.”

— “THAT’S FALSE!” shouted Speedo.

A silence.

— “But... I respect them. That’s all.”

THE COUNTER-COMMS STRIKE
To fight back, Castagnor launched the first official anti-rumor campaign:

Leaf signs saying: “A good rumor deserves a good gag.”

Stamps reading: “Certified by the Council of Honesties”

Temporary bark tattoos that proved your reliability (eco-friendly, of course)

Belladonna assembled a rumor-debunking squad, made up of serious owls, paranoid worms, and a beaver who never spoke (which made him highly trustworthy).

But the Rumeron struck harder.

He fabricated scandals:

Jean-Rasoir allegedly burned a pagan calendar.

Pluminette was hiding illegal nuts in fraudulent nests.

Castagnor... was actually a steroid-enhanced pigeon in disguise.

Chaos took hold.

THE RUMERON IS A GENIUS (A BIT TOO MUCH)
Perched atop a throne of crumpled newsprint, the Rumeron cackled:

— “As long as words burn, I don’t even need fire!”

But he overplayed his hand.

He accused the frogs of plotting a coup... while saying it in front of a choir of frogs... who were extremely well-armed.

THE REVEAL AND THE FALL
The frogs, offended, captured the Rumeron in an empty jam jar.
Castagnor interrogated him:

— “Why? WHY?”

The Rumeron smirked:

— “Because with a good enough rumor... you can rule a kingdom without a crown.”

Belladonna summarized:

— “He’s a pigeon. But a sociopath.”

THE END OF A NOISY CHAPTER
Calm returned—slowly.

But trust had been badly bruised.
No one looked at mushrooms the same way anymore.

Speedo installed a rumor detector (it whistled every time someone lied). It exploded immediately.

Jean-Rasoir offered a radical solution:
— “LET’S BAN ALL WORDS!”

— “Jean... get some sleep.”


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28 comments

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