Weekend Engagement - The Comparison

The Comparison

The prompt for this week's post revolves around comparison with someone else and how it affects me.

Who did I compare myself against?
To start things off, this comparison didn't start off with me wanting to compare with the subject of my comparison.

How it begin was that my mum having a colleague whom had a son, David, whom is exactly my age. While he and I did not attend the same school at all, we end up becoming compared and subsequently I wanted to compare with him.

How being compared became want to compare?
I was pretty annoyed because whenever I get my result slips during, even when David and I came from different schools, our grades will be compared and every single subject. Then came to national exams results and also the secondary school that we attend.

Often, being the playful me whom didn't really put in effort in my studies, ended up being on the receiving end of negative comparison remarks such as, "You see, David did so much better than you. Why can't you study harder like him?" or "If only you study as hard as he does, your grades wouldn't be at this state".

And so, with such negative comparison, I felt lousy and wanted to show my parents, in particularly my mum, that I am equally capable as David is.

What did I do on this comparison?
I started putting more effort in my studies. Did more reading and also more practices on my math. I knew I had to catch up in order to be as capable as him. Even my mum saw that change in me when I hit the books when I reached home instead of turning on the computer to play some PC games.

What was the outcome?
I wanted to do well in the Primary Six National Examinations to proof myself. During the day when the results were released, I didn't do as good as what I expected and David did well as usual.

Impact and Lesson Learn
Not meeting the goal I wanted to get was disheartening. And this feeling of lousiness lasted with me for a good 4 years till the end of high school. I still tried hard to do well but every time I try, I will still get mediocre results. And it is through meeting one of my final year high school teacher whom shared to me that, trying too hard kills the joy of studying and unintentionally created stress within me. He reminded me that we all have an individual race of our own and there is no need to compare. This sharing got me out of that lousiness and I regained joy in the things I do and I need not be bothered with what others are or how they do

Today I have graduated from college and happily settled down. As to how David is, he also has graduated and settled down with a family of his own. Do I have to strive and always compare to him to be successful? If not for meeting my high school teacher, I would probably still be feeling lousy till today.

Concluding Words
I really felt that comparison brings us no where. Everyone has skillsets and talents different from one another. We each have our own race, enjoy the race process and live life to the fullest rather than lock ourselves in a comparison that rob us of what is meant for us.

Thank you for reading my post.
If you've any thoughts, do also share with me in the comments
Here's wishing all a happy and blessed weekend!