Focus on what you can control

The other day, I had a rather weird dream.

I was on a boat which was not mine, and that's already weird because I'm really not a boat person, but apparently, I was having a good time.

I was with other people I'm not entirely sure I knew, but we were friends in the dream. We were having fun talking and drinking, and suddenly, I noticed a big wave was about to hit us.

I remember clearly how the wave sent us several feet above sea level, which felt real. It didn't take long before the boat started to sink.

And now, this is the weirdest part: for the entire duration of this situation, I remember feeling strangely calm. Instead of losing my mind and succumbing to desperation, I remember clearly going for life vests and instructing the people with me to do the same, and then swim away from the sinking boat.

I don't remember much about what happened after that because I usually have multiple dreams every night and they tend to get mixed up but I woke up not long after that.

Focus on what you can control

What really impressed me about this dream was how calm I felt during the whole situation. Instead of acting on instinct, I was thinking very clearly and in total control of every action I took.

Granted, it was only a dream, and I have no idea whether I would be able to remain that calm in a real situation (probably not), but the lesson I took from this whole thing is to focus on what I can control.

This reminds me of something Taskmaster said on one of the Cryptomaniacs episodes) about New Year resolutions.

One of the biggest problems with those - and, I believe, the reason why people rarely stick to their resolutions - is that the focus is on the wrong place.

People usually focus on the outcomes: "I want to lose x pounds", "I want to earn y per month with my blogging", I want to get z followers on Hive by the end of March".

While those are nice goals and can be considered SMART, a goal without a plan is wishful thinking.

In all of those examples, the person who sets those goals is not in full control of the outcomes. They can influence the results but they cannot control them.

Instead, what they can control are things like going to the gym five times a week, writing a quality post every day, or interacting with 5 different Hive users every day.

These are not outcomes but rather actions that may influence the status quo toward the expected outcomes. And the best part is that we can have total control over them.

The same logic can be applied to most aspects of life.

In investing, for example, I can't control what the markets will do, and consequently, I can't control what the price of an asset will be. I can, however, control how much and where I invest, which allows me, at the very least, to mitigate risk to a comfortable level.

As a rule, I don't invest any money I can't afford to lose, and I do my own research to make sure I only invest in projects I have some level of trust in. That's still a gamble, but it's the best I can do.

It may be a personal thing but I find some level of comfort in knowing that I did everything that was in my control in a situation, regardless of the outcome. Ironically, I find it empowering, even though it's often a reminder of how powerless I am.

Final thoughts

In all aspects of life, there will be things under our control and things that we cannot control. Spending energy on the things we can control may influence outcomes toward what we desire. Spending energy on the things we cannot control is merely a waste of that energy.

Understand what are the things you can control and the things you cannot.

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