REPEATING A FATHER'S MISTAKE

Ever heard of a generational cause, okay here's my story. So my dad doesn't really talk much about his old man, but one of the few times he did, he mentioned that one of the things that made him leave home as a young man to hustle was when his father's debtors came to carry his father's most treasured possession. I can't remember exactly what it was, only the part where he said the whole family including his dad cried, begged and followed their debtor pleading for a little more time to pay back, but the debtor wouldn't listen. According to him, after that incident, he decided to leave his parents to hustle for himself which he has been doing ever since.

But later in his life, he started borrowing and borrowing until he wasn't able to pay back and that was when a lot of things began to fall apart in my family. Looking back 98% of the problems my family encountered and are even facing to date are because of the debts accumulated by my dad. At a point, I became angry with him for not understanding his reasons for not stopping even when he knew that deep down he wouldn't be able to pay back. What I hated the most was how he left my mum in the heat of it all to bear the consequences of his actions because he couldn't stand the shame and humiliation, and countless times would run away when his debtors started looking.

The last time I stayed home for long, I was at home when some policemen came to our house, they had tracked him down and when they asked me if he was home, I looked at them and though he was my father, I knew he had to face the consequences this time instead of running. So I went inside to call him myself, he already knew they were around and was hoping I would lie for him to escape again. I could see his disappointment when he discovered I had made them know he was around. He looked at me as though I sold him out, and a part of me felt guilty for it. At the end of the day, my mum went around as always looking for money to bail him out. This time I even contributed because I felt I put in there in the first place, but the issue is he never learned his lesson and would never appreciate my mother's efforts for him.

Later in life, I found myself in the same circle. However, mine was a little different from his because it was born out of helplessness and the necessity to move forward without the help of anyone. Not because I was refusing help but because help never came forth. I do not regret my actions even though they cost me a lot which I'm still paying for to date. Another reason mine was different was because I never borrowed above my means. At this point, a lot of people I told about my situation advised me not to borrow, but none could offer an alternative solution to raising the money I needed. It was the period I was in my final year In school, still struggling to pay my fees, textbooks and everything in between.

There came my project fee which cost over 100,000 naira in construction and implementation (as an engineering student). I knew there was no help from anywhere, I had begged everyone I knew (Something I'm not used to). But even those I knew had enough to give for some reason refused to help me. This was when I started considering the loan apps that had been calling me after my former boss opened an account for me with them and used it to purchase a phone some days back. He paid back in time and gave me a good credit record. But then I decided Also to see how much I could afford to borrow, how soon I could pay back and what I had if things went sideways.

Long story short, I used my hive account as a backup plan and took the loan. But what I didn't put into consideration was that it was pointless negotiating with loan companies especially when it comes to extensions and late payments. These people didn't let me rest and would call me in the morning, afternoon and evening. This led me to power down massively but I should be done with all the payments next week. But the power down which was my last resort became the first when the loan company opted to call everyone in my contact list, parading me as a thief. This has led me to rethink the act of borrowing in future because of the adverse effects it has had on my father and grandfather… now I must create my own part and try to build wealth without bringing borrowing into the picture.

ALL PICTURES ARE MINE

THIS IS MY RESPONSE TO HIVE LEARNER'S PROMPT FOR WEEK 111 EPISODE 3