Has My Favorite Hobby Lost Its Worth?

Recently, I’ve been feeling uninterested in a lot of things. A dark fog has settled over my thoughts, clouding my interests and sucking away everything that excites me. I used to be enthusiastic, passionate, and energetic, but now, I feel weak, caged, lost, and misplaced. The once-shiny stars that used to shine brightly, coloring and beautifying my dreams, have now been dimmed by an unknown source- a string source indeed. I feel trapped in a black cage where silence has proven to be the solution. This feeling is not new to me, but I don't think I have ever experienced this level of apathy.

Chess is my favorite hobby. It is a board game that helps strengthen my intellect and makes me think smoothly. Chess is my favorite hobby. Yes! One important thing you should know about me is that I love playing chess. I'm not a pro at it yet, but I love the feeling that comes while playing the board game. Whenever I feel down, chess has always been the answer to my problems. Whenever I feel empty, broken, and shattered into pieces, I always find solace in chess. But, recently, It seems as if the love and joy I once found in chess has suddenly dissipated. Once, the chessboard used to represent a war zone, but now, it is just an empty space. The pieces that once had meanings, now sit on the board, devoid of meanings.

Chess used to be my escape root. But now, I just force myself to do it. It is quite amusing how something I used to do for pleasure has now turned into something I have to struggle to do- a job, maybe? Well, I don't think this hobby has totally lost its worth. Yesterday, I participated in hive chess tournament. For the first time in about 2 weeks, I enjoyed playing the game. I put in so much effort into the game, but right after the tournament, I lost interest in it.

I thought about how I've been feeling lately and I tried to pinpoint the cause of this feeling, but I just couldn't. A few days ago, I came across a post about “Dopamine.” I don't have a clear understanding of what it really is. What I know about it is that it is a chemical that is released when we do something fun. Interestingly, when the body has released too much dopamine, things like this start to happen. As I read, the best approach is to take time off everything- social media, games, movies, and so on. This is what I plan on doing.

Thanks for reading.