The 3 horsemen of success

I always find it interesting how every time I hear I word now, I’m able to give an explanation of the word closest to its dictionary definition or explanation. For an odd reason though, I’ve searched for the meaning of success in my mind for the past 2 days and I always come up with something different every time I think of it.

According to google, the Cambridge dictionary defines success as “the achieving of the results wanted or hoped for”. This definition is sort of vague in the sense that it doesn’t define success specifically in terms of “what exactly the results wanted or hoped for” is. Which is actually okay, because that specification will depend on who is defining success, their specific aspirations, and their situation.

With all this being said, I don’t think success has one specific definition even in my book. I have so many books, so the definition will be based on which book I’m reading at the time.

The Financial Book

Looking at success from a financial ground, success would simply be being financially free. In my book, I don’t need to be on a stupid list of the richest people in the world to consider myself successful. Although, that wouldn’t be too bad. What would be enough evidence of financial success is a simple ability to afford what I want when I want. So, my family should live well and have access to nice things.

The Book of Education

If I’m able to get a PhD and be on a tenured faculty track at a good university somewhere in the next 10 years, I’d say I am pretty successful. Of course, that doesn’t mean other achievements will not be celebrated. In this case, I’d say google’s definition works pretty well here, as the result hoped for is a PhD and tenured faculty track position at a good University.

Family Book

Where I come from specifically, no matter how successful you’re in other aspects of your life, you won’t be respected until you have a family that exudes of your success. You’re held in the esteem of what type of family you have been able to build.

I know a few financially successful men who are not really seen in the light of respect because even with their riches, they’re not able to build a good family. I believe this is one of the reasons women married to financially successful men don’t find happiness in their marriage if they’re not able to father children – because society assumes they sacrificed their fertility. This is a common superstition that many rich and childless couples are unfortunately accused of.

Work-Life Balance

One thing I think people who are revered for being embodiments of success lack for which I consider them unsuccessful is an inability to find a proper work-life balance. I understand well that sometimes the richer people get, the busier they get and so the less time they have to spend with their families because of how much responsibility they have to shoulder at work.

A friend was telling me just tonight about a certain famous rich man in Ghana, McDan was complaining about how difficult it was for him to find a balance between his life and work, and how everybody looks up to him as “having it all”. As much as being rich scores you huge points on the success board, I don’t think it really represents success if it frequently robs you of spending quality time with your family.

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Success can take many forms, and do not necessarily have to be measured even on the metrics I’ve discussed here. A successful person may not have had a great education formal (we see this a lot among drop outs turned businessmen). Likewise, someone that has built a great loving family can consider themselves successful. It really just boils down to what you consider most important to you.

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All images are mine

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