Marriage - Should I Stay Single?

Marriage is a very interesting topic, a divisive one, and a very controversial one as well. It has a lot of faces, some look friendly, making you want to rush into one, and some look very repulsive, that you want to run from everything that has to do with marriage.

But to me, marriage is like a box of chocolates, you never really know what you'll get (Lol!). While it is very good to plan and calculate very properly before choosing a mate, if people's experience and conventional wisdom is something to go by, it is evident that in the marriage institution, you just can't get it all right.

However, marriage seems to me like a stage, and for most persons that will choose not to, while it is a choice they have made, it is a tough one to make (just as it is a tough one to get married), as they would have to constantly fight against that natural innate desire to get married, not talking/referring to the strong societal push/expectations surrounding marriage. So, in essence, just as we grow to learn to sit, crawl, walk, talk, run, and more, marriage to me seems like a part of human development.

We get married for a lot of obvious reasons, but one innate desire pushing marriage among people is the craving for companionship, which even when people don't formally or legally get married, they also find themselves into some sort of complicated union that sometimes, may become even worse than the marriage they were avoiding in the first place, with the only pro being that it is much easier to leave with very little or no opportunity cost.

To me, marriages, when done well, legally and socially recognized is highly recommended for people of the opposite sex that believes they would like to take their love and relationships up a notch. It provides some sort of protection for both parties and acts a secure enclave to raise children. So, you need kids? The best thing I believe that could be gifted a child is he/she having parents and not baby mamas and/or baby papas. It gives a whole different vibes, especially here in Africa where moral standards concerning marriage is still held in high esteem.

The complication of marriage is a constant feature and it arises from a very obvious reason - two imperfect strangers have decided to live a lifetime of love. However, we all know how love is transient, it fades with time, and reality sets in. The reality are the differences that makes each party unique as an individual, but that uniqueness is always what comes in the way of a healthy marital relationship.

As an unmarried fellow but one who desires to be married someday, observing married people around me just keeps giving me these constant reminders of things I wish to do better when I eventually get married. Marriages doesn't scare me as much, I just crave to be very better at it when my time comes, to be a better wife, a better mother, a better parent, and a better couple/mate.

We will all get married at some point, whether in a legally and socially recognized manner or by cohabitation, whatever be the case, I believe, marriage is what couples make it



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4 comments
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marriage is like a box of chocolates, you never really know what you'll get

Be ready to open the chocolate box and you don't need to throw it but instead face and learn how to handle it.

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My sister! When the time comes, we'll open it and eat all the chocolates!

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