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RE: Lies We Tell Ourselves About the World
Pointing fingers and assigning blame have almost become full contact sports in this day and age.
This line is pure gold good sir!
In pyschology there's the concept of Locus of control which is essentially what you can control, then there's what you can influence, and then things you cannot control.
For exemple I can control that I'm typing to respond to this, I can influence my likelihood of being in a car accident by driving safely but someone else could still break rules and hit me despite my doing everything right, and I have absolutely no control over the weather, nor can I stop an earthquake.
Many folks end up with problems because they have a distorted concept of what they can control or can't in either direction.(Either taking responsibility and having guilt over things they don't control, or never taking accountability).
I try to be logical about it, and even if I can't fix the core thing I wish I could change, I can try to have a healthy and growth mindset around the things I can change.
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True enough! Some things are definitely beyond our control... although it can be a challenge to accept that they are truly "random" when something bad keeps unfolding, time after time.
Always makes me question whether it's my entire approach to life that's wrong!
Tangentially related, I came across an interesting article today, describing how trauma takes different shapes. As a metaphor, the trauma resulting from damage to your home because it has an unstrable foundation is quite different from the trauma resulting from a tree falling in a storm and putting a big hole in the roof.