RE: How to Tame Your Dragon.

In a perverse way, pain has been helpful to you in focusing your attention to what really matters in life.

On a related note, I watched an interview with Jordan Peterson in which he remarks about many people who are in hospice tending to have the same focus on what really matters in the short time they have remaining. He further states that there are some who take that personal hell and make it worse by being bitter and resentful. They amplify their hell.

On a separate note, there have been many people with illnesses who have accomplished great things. René Descartes, Stephen Hawking, Frida Kahlo, John Milton, and Theodore Roosevelt are a few people with health problems that pushed through their limitations to accomplish great things.

Personally, I find it inspirational that despite your challenges and environment you are able to support yourself and help others.