The illusion of Perfection

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I have always wanted to be seen perfect in the eyes of everyone. Sometimes because of fear of what some people might say, instead of doing something to their seeing I'll rather do it when I am alone even though it's nothing serious because of fear of judgement and what they would say. It's as if I wanted to be seen by people as the perfect example without any flaw, which is impossible.

So I'm extremely cautious of the things I saw or do when people are near me, even though it's people that I'm very familiar with. Sometimes when I'm with a couple of my friends and they are talking about some character that they don't like about someone that is also a friend of ours while the person is not around I would think to myself if only I can behave in a way that would seem suitable to them then if they talk about me in my absence it would be all good. I wanted everything I do to be ticked good by the people around me.

It also goes with other areas like refusing that start off something because I feel I don't have all that is required for me to make it perfect. I wouldn't want people pointing out one or two things that appears wrong or out of place. It's very important to me that all my "I's" are dotted and all my "T's" are crossed. If care is not taken I'll even add an extra dot and cross to them. It even goes with small things like buttering my bread ensuring that every single area of the bread is covered with butter, or passing an information from one person to another ensuring that I say the exact words instead of just paraphrasing it.

But then I realized that there is no such thing as perfect. It is all an illusion. Perfection would mean that you have come to the end of the road at something and if that were the case there wouldn't be advancements just like in technologies and other areas. Pursuit for perfection has been one of the major hindrances to achieving our dreams. We can only to do to our best but it can never be perfect. Our flaws would always be a part of us because we are humans. It's like we are trying to be God who did everything perfectly and that's not possible, so let's stop trying to do so.

Even the heroes we look up to as the perfect being have their own imperfections that may amaze us. M.I Abaga made us know this about himself through his song Imperfect me.

This is not an encouragement to live life mindlessly or recklessly with the mindset that after all no one is perfect. As much as possible we should strive for a better version of ourselves but at the same time we should know that we can never do it hundred percent. So it's okay to start off with that thing which would look terrible at the first place, but with time we would improve and get better even though it would never be perfect. If we ever get to perfect that brings an end to learning which contradicts the belief that learning never ends.