Real Adulthood Begins When It’s Not Just About You

Adulthood is not what you think it to be...

What does it mean to be an adult, actually? On the norm, when you start to live alone, pay your bills, and take care of yourself, that's when you know adulthood has struck. Suddenly, life shifts, and you realize the comfort of childhood is far behind. We've got to keep living life till we finally find our soul mate who would complement us and make the work easier, that is if your partner is also doing the job to support you.

It can be hard, truly, when you are carrying the whole responsibility by yourself.

Someone told me how I don't have responsibilities like she does because she's married and with kids. Does that mean without being married and having kids, I don't have responsibilities, too? What a shallow mindset! How about paying my rent all by myself? How about buying foodstuffs and making sure I don't go hungry? How about settling the family's needs?

I looked at her and clarified her mentality. I let her know I have two younger siblings who are in the university, and I only have a father who doesn't work, but we still send money and food to him. What can you say about that? I asked her. She couldn't say anything.

Some people can be so funny that they start to spill rubbish from their mouths when they don't know your story or what you've been through. When I shared a little of my story with her and how I sponsored myself in the university and what I had to go through to be where I am today plus my family's responsibility, she exclaimed and said I really tried. Oh now, you know I tried?

Once you have entered that stage where you have to take care of yourself without expecting from your parents, that's the beginning of real adulthood. When you have younger ones to take care of and still have to deal with the shenanigans of people and life in general, just know those are responsibilities you have to cater for as an adult, too.

You don't have to get married and have kids before you know you carry real responsibilities.

This Friday would make it two weeks since my younger sister, the last born, has been with me. And to tell you something, that girl eats a lot! Not even up to half of what I eat, and yet it’s three full meals every day. 😅

I had to imagine what our parents went through to take care of us providing three square meals for us and still packing snacks and drinks to school. I remember my sister when she was very little, how her mouth never stopped as she found something to chew. Dad would say, “When you are not a goat that chews nonstop!” 😅😅

Truly, adulthood is not what you think it is until you have someone living with you. Then, you know what you're in for. Like, how do you guys cope? I haven't had someone live with me where I would be the one taking care of them without their support.

My sister is the first person, and that made me conclude that being an adult is not just about living alone, paying the bills, or sending money to family members who need it.

It’s not until you have someone living under your roof while they eat and you work for the money that it truly hits. Food meant for you alone would be shared in two.

I am not complaining, because why would I? She is my sister, my blood. If I don't allow her, who else will? And what does that make me?

I'm just writing this post to share my feelings about what real adulthood means and to appreciate everyone who is taking care of those living under them because it’s not a small job.

I'm just lucky that she would be finishing school by next year, and paying school fees, rent, food, etc., would get reduced by then. For the ones we've been helping with right from the start, God has been faithful and will continue to be.

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_{Both images are mine}