I felt the guilt

I was busy with the dishes in the kitchen with my phone plugged to the power in the living room to charge. My ringing tone was playing nonstop.

"Who is this person stalking me with calls?" I fumed from the kitchen.

I cleaned my hands and rushed to the living room to pick up the call. I picked up my phone and saw about seven calls from Sandra.

"I hope this man hasn't done something bad again," I murmured to myself.

I dialed back her number, and I was greeted with wailing.

"What is the problem, Sandra?"

"My husband has done the worst," she responded to me.

"What happened, dear?"

"The conference that I left home for in the morning was canceled due to some unforeseen circumstances by the organizers. I arrived home this evening to meet Mike with one of his mistresses. I don't know why Mike is doing this to me." Sandra couldn't say anything more as crying overwhelmed her.

"Sorry for what you are going through. I will be on my way to your house now. If there is any human that can be compared to a chameleon, Mike is it. Please, stop crying. I will be with you shortly."

---

As I was leaving home, all that happened on that fateful day replayed in my mind. It was my birthday, and my husband sponsored an elaborate party to celebrate my turning 40. I invited my family and friends. My husband did the same.

The party was buzzing with guests coming on stage to dance to the music played by the DJ.

From where I was seated, I saw Mike, my husband's friend, go to meet Sandra on her table. Sandra is not just a friend; the bond between us is like that of blood sisters. Mike sat for a few minutes, talking to Sandra, before returning to his table. A few minutes later, I saw my husband go to Sandra's table too. He stayed for a few minutes too.

"I think something is playing out. I hope my birthday is not becoming a matchmaking event," I smiled.

Sandra met me immediately after the party to inform me of Mike's intentions.

"Mike is asking me to date him."

"I suspected as much. I saw him and my husband taking turns to invade your corner."

"It's not an invasion, please."

A mild smile displayed her white teeth and uncommon dimples. Beauty resonates all over her. Men hardly took their eyes off her.

"He requested my number, and I refused to give it to him. That was when he involved your husband to talk to me on his behalf. The involvement of your husband quenched some of my fears. So I gave him my number."

"Do you like him?" I asked Sandra.

"Common!!! It's too early to ask that question. Moreover, I am not ready for any relationship now. I couldn't say no to giving Mike my number when your husband got involved."

"That reminds me. What is the fear that you nursed initially before my husband talked to you?" I asked Sandra.

"Have you forgotten the number of unsuccessful relationships that I have been in in recent years? I am scared of men. Since the day I realized that John was married with kids, I learned not to believe any man again."

"John is a betrayal. The way he lied to you that he was single was embarrassing. I was hurt with his actions too. However, if you close your eyes to avoid seeing bad people, good ones will pass you by without knowing. I want you to believe me that Mike is a single and responsible man. Give him a chance."

"Your husband said so too, and I believe him. I asked him if Mike was like him in character since they are close friends, to which he answered affirmatively. The personality of your husband is what every woman is praying for."

"Thank you for the honor bestowed on my husband," I chipped in. "I can assure you that Mike will wipe out your tears regarding your ugly experience with the relationship."

My conversation with Sandra that night convinced her to go into a relationship with Mike.

The relationship was smooth sailing, and six months later, Mike proposed marriage to her. She called me to express her skepticism.

"Isn't it too early to accept Mike's proposal? I don't want to rush things," she told me over the phone.

"Sandra, you don't have to delay it if he is ready to get married to you. It's not how long but how well. Your previous relationship that lasted for years, did it guarantee marriage? If Mike has been good to you over the last six months that you started dating, accept his proposal. May I remind you that good men are scarce? Don't forget that I dated my husband for only three months before our wedding. The choice is yours to make."

"Thank you so much," Sandra responded to me. "I truly agree that it's not how long but how well. Prepare to start ordering bridesmaid materials from that your favorite online shop."

"Just show me that finger with the ring and see me take it up as my personal wedding. You deserve more than that."

"Thank you for your love and quality advice. You are more than a friend," Sandra concluded.

Two months later, the two lovebirds got married.

The marital journey was smooth sailing for only a year before Sandra started reporting Mike for infidelity.

---

My mind was enveloped with guilt as I proceeded to Sandra's house. "This lady expressed a lot of fears about this man, but my husband and I convinced her into the marriage. I wish I never did this."

I met Sandra's face soaked in tears. The eyes were red. On her hand was the picture of their wedding. She wailed continuously.

"I regret this day." She shakes the picture in her hand. "I regret the day I met this man."

"I am sorry for what happened. Where are your husband and her mistress?" I asked her.

"They entered his car and drove away when I caught them under the blanket on my matrimonial bed."

"This is a part of Mike that my husband and I were never aware of. I am sorry for convincing you to go into this marriage. Mike has really let all of us down."

"You don't have to. He didn't display this habit while we were dating. He must have successfully hidden it from everyone. It's not your fault. Every experience is a lesson, and I am learning it the hard way. What I want now is the dissolution of this marriage. I can't continue to live my life in sadness," said Sandra.

"At this juncture, I can't tell you to do otherwise from what your instinct is directing you to. I told you to wait for concrete evidence before taking any actions, and now you have the evidence. You wear the shoe, and you know where it pinches. I will support you in any decision you are taking."

Sandra had been suspecting that Mike was cheating on her. She caught him expressing romantic love with someone else on the phone a few weeks earlier. Sandra escalated the issue. Her pastor and I asked her to hold on from taking any drastic action with evidence that isn't concrete.

What happened that day was the straw that broke the camel's back. Their differences became unreconcilable.

The marriage hit the brick wall, and both parties went their separate ways. My husband and I were heartbroken. The more we apologized to Sandra, the more she told us that there was no fault of ours.

"I just need to keep my mind off marriage now. It can't work for everyone. Maybe I am unfortunate to be among those that were not destined to experience the happiness of marriage," she told me in the court premises after the union was dissolved.

"It doesn't matter how many times we fall. What matters is how we rise after each fall. It's normal to have a rest after a fall before trying again. You need time to heal. However, don't write yourself off from the list of people that will experience a happy marriage. You shall rise and smile again," I consoled her.

My husband's friendship with Mike reached the end of the road.

"I can't allow a friend to dent my image twice," he declared.

Sandra picked up her life, and she found happiness in advancing her career as a top management staffer in a tier 1 bank.