PLEASING SELF

“We are so quick to judge”, this is a phrase so many of use whenever we are being confronted with a truth or probably a lie. We get easily defensive when our dirty linen is brought out in the open and the next thing or word that comes to mind to say is that we are being judged. Many times I have tried to think about ways to stop being a judge in people’s lives because they don’t want me to be and also because I’m not perfect myself but then, I still find myself meddling in their businesses and I get burned for that most of the time.

What people want these days is for us to do whatever we like when we want to and no one should saying a thing about it. Well, it’s fine to make compliments on what they have done but not to make corrections because that is what they want to do and it doesn’t concern others. Well, I want to let you know that you matter more than that. You are not free to do whatever you want because that is what gives you the joy and happiness you seek when it is obviously having an impact on the person or people around you.

Yes, you have the freedom to either choose to accept whatever wisdom or nonsense I’m saying or not. But know this today that we as humans don’t have the freedom to live like lawless people. That’s why we are higher animals. Our creator (God) has given us a well developed brain to think so we don’t just do whatever we like. And even beside the brain he gave to us, he also gave us people who also have brains too because he has always known that one man can never do it all by himself.

Yes, people are quick to judge (like some will say I’m doing right now and they are right) and they will keep on doing so. This is never to hunt us. For me, this is them playing their role as humans in our lives to help us become better. It hurts but then, if only we can listen most of the time, we will be proud of ourselves. I know you think people's opinions don’t matter but they do. It’s your life after all. You are willing to bear whatever consequences that comes with your actions, right? Well, maybe you are but others aren’t ready for what the effects of your actions will be on them.

As much as we have the power to make choices, we should be very careful not to be so selfish about it too. Just because you don’t get affected by cold doesn’t mean everyone should get use to it when they visit your home. Or because you don’t like taking breakfast everyone should do likewise because you are in charge. When you do these, people are seeing you and they are bound to judge you and if they are kind enough to confront you with your imperfections, the moment you see them as them being judgy, it will be hard for you to see a reason to change.

A man once told me something that I still remember subconsciously when I make decisions. He said that, whenever someone is bold enough to confront us about something they feel or think we are not doing right, whether or not their plans is to body shame us or not, that’s a great form of love because even those we call our best friends most times will never tell us the truth.

These days, I don’t see people as being judgy especially when I know deep down that what they are saying has an atom of truth in it. They probably didn’t get the right idea and I owe it to them to explain things better (the world teaches something different though) or change if that is what is needed. If people are not “judging” you, that means you don’t have people who love you enough or you are probably a perfect person. Learn to appreciate them even if you don’t at the point of them judging you. Iron they say sharpens iron. If you wish to go far, you need me and I need you.

Thank you for reading through. ❤️