The Comedy Rumble: ¡Corre, Eduard, corre! [ESP/ENG]
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¡Hola a todos, amigos de Hive! Especialmente a la comunidad de Comedy Open Mic. Este no es el primer post que publico dentro de esta comunidad, en realidad es el segundo que escribo; pero sí es el primero que hago dentro del concurso semanal de The COMedy Rumble Week 3.
Hello everyone, friends of Hive! Especially to the Comedy Open Mic community. This is not the first post that I publish within this community, it is actually the second that I write; but it is the first one I do within the weekly contest of The COMedy Rumble Week 3.
Un concurso impulsado por @amirtheawesome1 , @thisismylife y @lisfabian para promover las riiiisas (dicen que reír rejuvenece y ayuda a vivir más feliz); donde puedes contar todo tipo de anécdotas (PD.: las más vergonzosas les gustan mucho). Así que si también quieres participar y optar por varias recompensas, te invito a unirte al concurso y seguir sus reglas.
A contest promoted by @amirtheawesome1 , @thisismylife and @lisfabian to promote laaaaughter (they say that laughing rejuvenates you and helps you live happier); where you can tell all kinds of anecdotes (PS: they really like the most embarrassing ones). So if you also want to participate and be eligible for various rewards, I invite you to join the contest and follow their rules.
Hoy les contaré una breve historia que me sucedió cuando era niño (todavía no llego a los 30, así que no comiencen a sacar cuentas); pero en seguida les advierto: ¡Padres, no dejen a sus hijos solos en casa!
Today I will tell you a brief story that happened to me when I was a child (I'm not even 30 yet, so don't start doing the math); but right away I warn you: Parents, do not leave your children home alone!
Era uno de esos días comunes, en los que mis padres se levantaban a las 3:30 de la madrugada para organizar todo lo que mi papá llevaría al trabajo: desayuno, almuerzo y cambio de ropa. Debido a que vivíamos un poco lejos de la ciudad, debían estar despiertos a esa hora para alistar todo antes de las 5 a.m., hora en la que mi papá saldría a trabajar.
Era día de semana, pero por el motivo que no recuerdo, yo no tenía clases. Así que solo me levanté a las 4 a.m. (como era habitual cada día) para tomar café y luego volver a dormirme; algo extraño, ¿cierto?
Bueno, casi a las 7 de la mañana volví a despertarme cual relojito para alistarme e ir al colegio; “¡Ah, cierto, hoy no tengo clases!” dije frente a mi mamá, quien ya estaba arreglada para ir a donde mis abuelos. Ellos vivían frente al colegio donde estudiaba (unos 30 minutos de mi casa), pero como ese día no tenía clases, entonces no fui con mi madre.
It was one of those ordinary days, in which my parents got up at 3:30 in the morning to organize everything that my dad would take to work: breakfast, lunch and a change of clothes. Since we lived a little far from the city, they had to be up at that time to get everything ready before 5 a.m., when my dad would go to work.
It was a weekday, but for some reason I don't remember, I didn't have classes. So I only got up at 4 a.m. (as usual every day) to drink coffee and then go back to sleep; something strange, right?
Well, almost at 7 in the morning I woke up again like a little clockwork to get ready and go to school; "Oh right, I don't have class today!" I said in front of my mom, who was already dressed to go to my grandparents. My grandparents lived in front of the school where I studied (about 30 minutes from my house), but since I didn't have classes that day, so I didn't go with my mother.
Se despidió de mí diciendo “Voy y regreso rápido; puedes volverte a dormir”, me dio la bendición y se fue. Antes de volver a la cama aproveché para ir a orinar (el baño estaba construido fuera de la casa). Solo dejé entreabierta la puerta y salí.
¿Cuál fue mi desesperación? Mientras un manantial de líquido acuoso salía de mí, escuché claramente un “¡PUM!”. En seguida detuve la acción y salí del baño para confirmar mi sospecha: LA PUERTA SE HABÍA CERRADO COMPLETAMENTE.
She said goodbye to me saying “I go and come back fast; you can go back to sleep”, She gave me her blessing and left. Before going back to bed I took the opportunity to go urinate (the bathroom was built outside the house). I just left the door ajar and walked out.
What was my despair? As a stream of watery liquid poured out of me, I clearly heard a “PUM!”. I immediately stopped the action and left the bathroom to confirm my suspicion: THE DOOR HAD BEEN CLOSED COMPLETELY.
Mi mamá me había dejado sus llaves antes de irse, pero ya sabrás dónde estaban al momento de cerrarse la puerta: Sí, dentro de la casa (consejo: ténganlas SIEMPRE con ustedes). La verdad no sabía qué hacer; y como todo niño, comencé a desesperarme. “¿Y si me meto por una ventana?” No, Eduard, tienen protectores. “¿Y si le doy patadas a la puerta?” No sé qué lograrías con eso. “¿Y si entro por el techo? Ya va, ¿en qué estás pensando, Eduard?”… eran todas las voces dentro de mi cerebro.
Lo más pronto que decidí hacer, antes que el llanto me ganara, fue ir en búsqueda de mi mamá; total, no hacía mucho que se había ido. Así que salí por el patio trasero en chancleta, shorts y sin camiseta (Ya se imaginarán la vergüenza al estar en la calle); y comencé a correr (en realidad lo hice porque recordé una película llamada ‘Forrests Gump’, y supongo que por la desesperación mis piernas dijeron “para eso estamos”).
My mom had left me her keys before she left, but you know where they were when the door closed: Yes, inside the house (tip: ALWAYS have it with you). The truth is I didn't know what to do; and like every child, I began to despair. "What if I enter through a window?" No, Eduard, the windows have protectors. “What if I kick the door in?” I don't know what you would accomplish with that. “What if I go through the roof? Come on, what are you thinking, Eduard?”… were all the voices inside my brain.
The soonest thing I decided to do, before crying overcame me, was to go in search of my mother; After all, she hadn't been gone long. So I went out through the backyard in flip-flops, shorts and without a shirt (You can imagine the embarrassment of being on the street); and I started running (actually I did it because I remembered a movie called ‘Forrests Gump’, and I guess out of desperation my legs said “that’s what we are for”).
En breve llegué al pequeño terminal de la comunidad, todos me veían raro y con gestos de desprecio; mientras agitado pregunté por el último autobús que salió. Me dijeron que no hacía mucho que arrancó; pero como los choferes deben hacer una vuelta en varias cuadras antes de alejarse completamente de la zona, no dudé en seguir corriendo para ver si tenía suerte y encontrarme al autobús de frente (lo sé, lo sé. No es como ustedes están pensando).
Para eso tomé una calle de atajo mientras el chofer hacía las vueltas que comenté. Y en efecto, pude ver esa máquina con motor de seis ruedas venir hacia donde estaba yo. El problema era que me encontraba en plena autopista, sin camiseta, en shorts y chancletas (la deshonra del año). Hice una seña con mi mano (así cuando uno quiere que el chofer haga la parada), y en definitiva, el autobús se detuvo.
Mi madre bajó desesperada, pensando que algo malo había sucedido (En realidad sí, nunca terminé de orinar por todo lo sucedido). Yo trataba de explicar; pero entre sollozos que no salían, la agitación por el cansancio de la carrera y la forma en la que mi mamá y los demás pasajeros (incluyendo al chofer) me miraban por como estaba vestido, solo me salió un “¡La puerta se me cerró con las llaves adentro!” junto a una carcajada.
Soon I arrived at the small community terminal, everyone looked at me strangely and with gestures of contempt; while agitated I asked about the last bus that left. They told me that it hadn't been that long since it had advanced; but since the drivers have to make a turn in several blocks before leaving the area completely, I didn't hesitate to keep running to see if I was lucky and meet the bus in front of me (I know, I know. It's not like you are thinking).
For that I took a shortcut street while the driver made the turns that I mentioned. And sure enough, I could see that six-wheel-powered machine coming toward me. The problem was that I was in the middle of the highway, without a shirt, in shorts and flip flops (disgrace of the year). I made a sign with my hand (like when you want the driver to stop), and finally, the bus stopped.
My mother went down desperate and she thought that something bad had happened (Actually yes, I never finished urinating because of everything that happened). I was trying to explain; but between sobs that didn't come out, the agitation from the fatigue of running and the way my mom and the other passengers (including the driver) looked at me because of how I was dressed, I only got a "The door closed with the keys indoors!" along with a belly laugh.
Fue bastante chistoso, tal vez fue mi reacción frente a toda la situación. Mi madre me consoló y me dijo que esperara en casa de la vecina mientras ella regresaba con llaves de repuesto. Y así fue, nuevamente me regresé en chancletas, shorts y sin camiseta por la autopista; pasando por el pequeño terminal hasta llegar a mi casa, mientras todos me seguían viendo de una forma muy extraña.
Pero yo bien contento llegué a casa de la vecina (mentira, pasando vergüenza) porque logré mi cometido de encontrarme con el autobús y mi madre (quien regresó poco tiempo después). Pero al final aprendí mi lección: siempre carga tus llaves contigo, vístete bien y nunca nunca vayas a orinar sin tomar precauciones con la puerta de tu casa.
It was quite funny, maybe it was my reaction to the whole situation. My mother comforted me and told me to wait at the neighbor's house while she came back with spare keys. And so it was, again I came back in flip flops, shorts and without a shirt on the highway; going through the small terminal until I reached the house, while everyone kept looking at me in a very strange way.
But I was very happy when I got to the neighbor's house (a lie, I was embarrassed) because I achieved my goal of meeting the bus and my mother (who returned to my house a short time later). But in the end I learned my lesson: always carry your keys with you, dress nicely and never ever go pee without taking precautions with the doors of your house.
)
Espero que mi pequeña historia haya sacado un par de risas (recuerden, reír es bueno para la salud); si bien siempre me da vergüenza cuando lo cuento, igual es un momento chistoso que quedó marcado. Así que también me gustaría que @hermaryrc y @sayury puedan participar de este concurso y contarnos las anécdotas que tengan. ¡Saludos a todos!
I hope my little story has elicited a couple of laughs (remember, laughing is good for your health); Although I am always embarrassed when I tell it, it is still a funny moment that was marked. So I would also like @hermaryrc and @sayury to be able to participate in this contest and tell us the anecdotes they have. Greetings to all!
Well, I can tell you that I know how that feels. Not 100% the same but here's what happened to me.. I was home alone with my oldest daughter who was just about 1 year old (I don't remember exactly but that must have been it more or less). I was in my bathrobe only and walked to the freezer in the garden shed to take out a few slices of bread. When I was outside like 5 steps, the door closed (I think it was the wind) and my daughter was already at the door looking what I was doing from the inside.
To my shock, she had taken the bottom handle of the door and she pressed it down, it was locked! Not with a key, no these extra protection handles you have on the door for more safety! I tried to convince her to lift it up, but of course that didn't work. Panic started to arise as I didn't have keys in my bathrobe and the garden door to outside was locked as well so there I was locked in our garden and my 1 year old jumping up and down on the couch in front of the window. I only thought please don't fall, please don't fall.. she fell!
I called for the neighbor and one of them came via the other neighbor with a ladder to climb through my bedroom window. My savior haha. Since then, I never left without a key if I had to go to the garden, I always made sure that in case of emergency, I could enter from the other side lol.
I was embarrassed as well of course because I was barely dressed and just getting started with the day haha. Lesson learned! Kids can't be trusted! lol
Thanks for entering! Good luck!
It must have been really scary, a lot of thoughts must have been running through your mind at the same time..I get it, most times when we tell ourselves not to fall, we end up falling anyway, maybe if you had said that, your baby wouldn't have fallen..
I'm glad you ended up being rescued and everyone is safe and sound..❤️✅
Yes, I know that now, never summon the universe :) lol
Always think about the thing you WANT to happen not the one you don't ...
Thankfully, she didn't have any injuries, that would have been horrible..
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Children certainly should not be trusted too much 😂 Well, I imagine that being in a bathrobe must have been worse than me on the highway hahaha You never have to leave your keys
Ja,ja,ja oye esto estuvo muy bueno, seguro se lee un poco cruel ja,ja,ja. Admiro a la mami, la madre da mucha confianza y de verdad te la tenía, mandarte de nuevo a casa así ja,ja,ja por la autopista ¡Dios! Oye recordé algo sobre eso de las llaves, mi puerta es mágica, ella no sirve, es decir no se cierra tan fácilmente, pero bastaba que yo estuviese afuera para zas para tirarme la indirecta: ¡fuera de aquí! Eres muy valiente, yo me quedo en el lugar hasta que llegue alguno ja,ja,ja.
Ha,ha,ha,ha hey this was really good, sure reads a bit cruel ha,ha,ha,ha. I admire the mommy, the mother gives a lot of confidence and she really had it for you, sending you back home like that ha,ha,ha,ha down the freeway God! Hey, I remembered something about the keys, my door is magic, it doesn't work, it doesn't lock so easily, but it was enough that I was outside to wham to give me the hint: get out of here! You're very brave, I'll stay in the place until someone arrives ha,ha,ha,ha
@lisfabian Era mandarme de nuevo a casa o irme con ella, ¿pero vestido así en transporte público? Ella ya sabía lo que decidiría 😂😂😂
Y lo de tu puerta, hey, siempre parece que las cosas saben en qué momento actuar jajajaja Muchas gracias por el apoyo!
Just reminds me of all the times I tell myself not to look down when I'm high up but I still end up looking down. Like it or not, we attract what we think. I'm glad you ended up being rescued, nice entry
That is very true: we attract what we think. And hey, you have to respect vertigo haha Thank you for reading!
Perhaps you might have stayed outside till your mom returns if you hadn't took such a step to find her 😅😅😅 but mehn, it would be so funny with the way you looked while running to check if you would see your mom. Such an embarrassing day for you but you learnt your lesson 😁
Maybe if I stayed I would avoid the moment of shame, but then there would be no story hahaha That's why they say that moments like this are the ones that remain in our memory the most. Thank you for reading 😄
No puedo con tanto jajajajajaa 🤣😂😅😂🤣😂😅.
¡Corre forest! 😅😂🤣
Ahorita (con menos de30), te sientas en el patio a esperar, porque pegar esa carrera 🤣😂😂...
Saludos.
Yo debí audicionar para la segunda parte de Forrest jajajaja
Y sí, tienes razón, ahorita (todavía no llego a los 30) es mejor quedarse a esperar 😂😂🤣
Gracias! Muchos saludos
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Thanks for the info, as always! @hivebuzz
You're welcome @eduardmartinez, it's well deserved! Thanks for your constant involvement on Hive 😊👍
Ja,ja, ja, muy buena anécdota, @eduardmartinez, gracias por la invitación. me gustó mucho tu estilo narrativo y también cómo presentaste el post con micros de video y demás. Mil bendiciones y éxitos.
Muchas gracias! @sayury todo es aprendizaje de alguien fenomenal que me motivó a esta plataforma 😁 Ahora espero leer tu historia!
Sí, @edurdmrtinez, me voy a activar con eso!!!