The System

I stared at the white sheet in front of me. Hard. Unblinking.

It couldn’t possibly be.

I made the dramatic gesture of cleaning my eyes even though I knew it wasn’t possible for this to be a figment of my imagination.

“Shocking, right?” I jolted at the sound surprisingly close to my ear.

“Eleanor,” I whispered, turning to the one person I knew would relate to the turmoil I felt inside.

“Florence, you’ve got to calm down.” She drew me to herself and whispered dramatically. “It may not look like it, but they are watching. Watching to see you break. You can’t give them that satisfaction.”

“Ellie, but I —” my usually clear voice was husky. I was breaking and I could feel it.

“You what?” she asked, chuckling. “Had confidence in the system? You should know better than to trust these people.

Though I didn’t say it, I knew Ellie knew. Because she too had seen it. The empty sheet Gloria had turned in. She’d seen her twirling her hair and chewing gum, a blank paper in front of her, while I had set, reeling in all my creative wits to produce what I thought was the best poem I’d ever written within the shortest time ever. But now I was staring at a list that said Gloria’s poem was not just the winning one, but mine wasn’t even among thetop three.

Did I really do so awfully?

Was I paying for something I didn’t know?

Gloria didn’t even need the money. Her dad was a senator, for crying out loud.

I thought of Mom who was probably pacing at the moment, waiting for our wooden door that was nearly off its hinges to creak open announcing my arrival. Waiting for a good news that was never going to come.

“I’ll ask for a re-mark.” I decided.

Eleanor looked at me like I’d suddenly sprouted horns. “You cannot be serious.”

“But I am,” I said, indignation welling strong in me. “I can’t let them get away with this.”

“You can’t take this up, Florence. You weren’t even in top three. You don’t stand a chance.”

“I have nothing to lose, Ellie. I can’t go down like this. The fate of my family depends on winning this.”

I could feel Eleanor’s pitying gaze burning a hole in my back. But I couldn’t be deterred. I knocked on the Principal’s office and waited. My palms felt clammy and my heart pounded an unsteady staccato. It was only the thought of Mom’s disappointed yet reassuring face that kept me there even though my insides withered in fright.

“Come in,” his voice boomed from behind the door. I took in a deep breath, and walked in. I wasn’t surprised to find him as well as the other judges in the panel. What I did not envisage was the look on their faces. Watery smiles that turned the butterflies in my belly to vicious wasps. They had been expecting me.

“Good evening, gentlemen.” I started, ignoring the knot in my belly. “I’m sure you already know why I’m here. I demand a re-mark.”

They all laughed. In unison. At me.

“ You demand?” one of them asked, giving me a bemused grin.

“Yes. My poem trended in the semi-finals. There’s no way I could have lost this. Please, re-mark this."

“So now she begs,” another chuckled. “Pick a side, Miss Florence. Are you demanding or you’re pleading?”

“I am appealing to your good conscience. I have no problems failing. I just want it to be deserved.”

“But you do deserve it,” the Director who had barely said a word since I came in, said. “What makes you think we will hand over such a bounty to the one person who believes she can get away with whistle blowing?”

Ah. I should have known. The education board had fired the Grammar teacher two months back because an anonymous person had left the board a recording of his attempts to harass a student. I’m guessing they knew now who that anonymous person was.

I gritted my teeth. “I don’t regret anything.”

“Fine, then,” the principal said. “You can shut the door on your way out.” He turned his head to the other men and began conversing, clearly dismissing me. There was no chance of getting my little sister back from her oppressors. Mom would be devastated. My already broken heart broke a little more.

I was already clutching the door’s handle when I heard myself call out. “Wait.”

They all turned to me, faces stoic, eyes devious. “What can I do to make up for this?”

Their collective grin made my head lurch. It was safe to say they had won. For now.

Jhymi🖤

Inspired by Freewriters' Daily Prompt: Confidence in yhe System.

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