Asking For Help.

For once, I have never been good at asking for help,like it is one of those things that I have always had a hard time doing, I am not the type of person who easily goes to people and says "I need help with this"in fact I usually try to figure things out by myself even when it is clear that I am making things harder for myself it is like my default way of doing things is to handle it all by myself whether it's easy or not.

For me asking for help only happens when it is absolutely necessary ,like when I have tried everything I can think of or when the situation is getting much for me to handle alone.. Even then I do not just go to anyone for help. It has to be someone really close to someone who actually gets me and will not judge me or make me feel weird ,I think that is a part of it, I do not like feeling vulnerable in front of anyone so I would rather keep things to myself than open up to the wrong person.

I guess part of why I'm like this is because I am used to doing things on my own, I like knowing that I can count on myself and handle my problems, there is a feeling of being in control that comes with that and I have to admit it feels good when I figure things out by myself, It makes me feel more confident and capable, so in that sense not asking for help all the time has some things about it.

At the same time I am very aware that this way of thinking has some bad things about it too, sometimes I end up dealing with more than I should just because I do not want to bother anyone or seem like I am not able to handle things.. the truth is, it can get really tiring, there are times when things could have been easier or less stressful if I had just spoken up earlier of waiting until I was almost too much to handle.

Another bad thing about not asking for help is that people might think you are doing fine, from the outside it can look like you have everything under control even when you really do not, so nobody steps in to help not because they do not care, because they do not know you need help.. then you are just dealing with everything alone which is not always the best way to do things.

i do not think it is idea to depend on people for everything but I also do not think it is healthy to shut people out completely too, i am slowly learning that asking for help does not mean you are weak or not capable, It just means you are human, everyone needs help at some point, there is nothing wrong with that.

If anything I think asking the people for help at the right time is actually a good thing, it shows that you know what you are doing and that you trust them, and since I already have a group of people I am comfortable with I am trying to get better at reaching out, to them a bit earlier instead of waiting until things get really bad.

So yeah, I would not say I find it easy to ask for help . I am also starting to understand that doing everything alone is not always the best way either, It is still something I am working on just learning how to open up a little more without feeling like I am losing that independence that I value much, asking for help is something that I am still working on, I think asking for help is an important part of being human.

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