The Stigma Struggle Is Real: Embracing My Story
Stigmas are a part of life and while they are mostly hurtful, they are also a form of realization to becoming better depending on what kind and who is facing it. I'm one of those who have had to go through some and have a story to tell. It's a story that today, I don't feel hurt about to tell.
Growing up, I didn't see a lot of things happening around me as a stigma story for the people it involved. One time in my childhood neighborhood, a lady was being talked about everywhere because they suspected she had AIDS because of hair loss and was looking lean.
My idea of AIDS then was very wrong so I would always want to run far away whenever I saw the lady coming, it was not just me. Until after sometime, we heard that she died from an illness and the mother was so sad. Since then, the neighbourhood saw the family as carriers too.
Thinking back now, I can't help but wonder how they must have felt then, especially the lady until her death. It's sad that stigmas can't be controlled especially the ones that have to do with illnesses, being addicts and criminal offences that leaves the offender or victim hurt.
My own story of being stigmatized comes from after the time my mum left us, it never got normal for myself and my siblings after that incident. Talk of pity talks, we got a lot of it, at least I got them a lot. I remember a time I kept crying after a small fight I had with a kid about my situation.
It was so bad that I kept asking dad to bring our mum back, I wanted to end the question of "so your mum left you people?" and run away from the hurt that comes whenever other mothers show up for their kids in school and mine never showed up. It took some time for me to adjust.
Another stigma I had to face is not being able to speak my mother's tongue, I could hear very well but speaking it has always been a problem and I got a lot of remarks that blamed me for not learning it. I blamed my parents at first but I came to realize I was the one who failed to learn.
Stigmas are bound to happen with many situations of people but living through it starts with embracing that reason for the stigma and adjusting to get rid of it as slowly as possible. Life is quite simple and time makes it that possible, over time things can get better or not.
What matters, from my life's story is, working towards making the most out of life even through stigmas. It's not easy but it get easier. I believe my stigma also helped me become stronger, there are some things that won't hurt me anymore even when it might hurt others. I am grateful for that simple fact and I'll keep going.
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Wooow
Such a story, I feared reading though. I felt so much pity for that sick lady and the family. Dealing with stigmas can be a lot and most cases people are not kind enough towards people who are struggling. Over here before awareness started creeping in gradually, being diagnosed with HIV was a death sentence. The thought of the stigma even kills faster than the actual sickness.
Sorry for your mum’s leaving. It can be hard moving forwards but it’s great to know you got adjusted to the situation over time. I lost my dad as a teenager and it was most difficult season of life.
Stigmas can be a lot to deal with, I’ve had my own fair share of it when people think I’ve not changed because of how I used to be in the past and then always make referents my past. Well, I just keep mute and let them say what they want to. I am better and stronger
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It was really like a death sentence, the lady died from the thoughts if it was really true she had it. Too bad.
Sorry about your dad, I just thank God my mum is alive where she is 🥹
That's a good approach to Stigma, best to keep mute and live your life.
I appreciate your comment 😊
🤗
Maybe the feeling of anxiety does come by itself, especially if we assume that the woman has AIDS, which is a very dangerous and deadly disease, but avoiding it is not a solution to building socialization within ourselves, stigma in society always appears and I agree with you that stigma depends on us judging it.
Yeah, avoiding her wasn't a solution at all. I think we only made it worse for her to bear.
I understand this type of stigma that came from ur mum absence. Unfortunately, u can't control it, but it hurts. It hurts more seeing that where mum should be there for u, she wasn't and people talk ill against you because of it
It's difficult to accept the situation, trash it and keep going but that's just the way to go...not everything we can control but as for ur mother tongue..better get to work o oo 😂
It was really hurtful but like you said, the way to go is to accept and keep going.
Leave me and my mother tongue, my can can't anymore 😂
Not being able to speak in ones mother tongue can be one stigma that people won't let you rest but mock you at any given time
Lol I'm experiencing that firsthand, God help me 😅
Dealing with stigmas can be a lot depressing for the victim but I have realized one thing about life and people, it is that people will say whatever they want to say and you can't stop them. But when you don't mind them but continue doing your thing, that's a great step but having to think about every one of those things make one to do the harsh things they aren't supposed to do. I really feel for that lady but that's life. Stigma is part of life.
That's just it o, people will always talk and I've come to understand that fact and learn to do what I can and have to do.
Is sad when people have health problems and we heard a lot of things even jokes of it, but I consider that depending on the situation it can get less painful by time 🫤💜
It's really sad.
But yeah, things get better and less painful with time.
Thanks for stopping by, Heli.
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