PROTECTING AND NOT OVERPROTECTING

It’s always interesting how interested I am in topics of this kind. I’m not yet a parent but I’m always curious to know the response I’d give to every topic that is parenthood related. The thing is, for every parent out there, they were once a child. And during the course of their being parented, they formed their own idea of what parenting should be like, what parents most times get wrong and they start looking forward to how to apply some of the ways forward they have learnt when they finally get the privilege to build their own homes.

Fortunately for me, I have been privileged a couple of times to watch how most people parenting ideas work and I have seen the things they have learnt from their parents and how they are applying it in their own homes. Some are good, while others are either a replica of what their parents have done to them or a complete opposite of it because they dread being like their own parents in any way at all. Mind you, with all of these ideas that we form as children turned into parents, most of them are built on the wrong assumptions and beliefs and they end up making us make even worst mistakes than our parents.

One thing I always like to remind myself of is that, “Hope, yes I know you have your own formed opinions and perspectives about different things as it pertains to life due to the different circumstances you’ve experienced but then, never forget that you are only human and there is every tendency to make the wrong choices from those formed ideas and beliefs”. So, as a person, I don’t like to think that I have the best perspective of things but then, I like to be open minded and learn from others perspectives but above all, my major source of knowledge will and always remain from God’s wisdom and the only way I can find that is in his inspired words (The Holy Bible).

When it comes to parenting, since I do not have a formal experience, for now, I just watch others and see how they respond to different circumstances and how much those responses bring forth good results. Indeed, as parents we are always tempted to want to be the center of our child’s life. Especially mothers, we want to make sure our child loves us so much and because of that, we always want to give them 100% support all the time. We always want to prove to them that we know better than them and sometimes, we even try to make them think that as their parents, we don’t make mistakes.

Mummies and daddies, let’s not forget that even though these children are our products and are small, they are humans as well, tiny little humans, cute, adorable and loving. When the Bible said, do to others what you want others to do to you, that applies in literally everything you can think of. If you want your child to listen to you, first, you have to listen to them. If you want your child to take care of you, first, you have to take care of them. If you want your child to respect you and others, first, you have to respect them and others and so on.

They are little children but not dumb. They see, hear, smell, feel and taste just like you. The only thing is that, they are still developing every aspect of their body and life. The reason why they have you is not to completely dictate everything to them, it is for you to be their guide. And because of that, you as a parent have to make sure that you are someone who is teachable and always willing to learn. You have to make sure you are learning the right approach to life so you can give your children the right response to their questions and problems because that is how they learn too.

Just as God has given man the power to make choices, as parents we shouldn’t forget that we have to guide our children in this aspect too because when they grow up, whether we like it or not, they will make their own choices, either from what we taught them or from what we failed to teach them. It is not all the time as a parent you tell your children what to do and exactly how to go about it. Sometimes, you give them the task and see how well they find a solution to it on their own. As a parent, all you have to do is be attentive and vigilant to how they respond to these tasks.

From their responses, you will know what kind of advice your child needs more and the next phase of learning they should be taking just like we have in our formal education system. There is a step by step to everything, including parenting. The moment we give our children the chances to make some choices for themselves, it will build their confidence in making decisions but on the other hand, as parents, you should be watching them very closely to see how to handle any mistakes they make and give them a better approach. And also, make sure you commend them for a good job too.

This is my response to the hivelearners topic on ”HELICOPTER PARENTING”.

Thanks for reading through. ❤️

_{Images used are mine}