Clear The Mess, Sort Out This Mess!

Why do we quarrel or fight over anything? It's a question that always comes to my mind when I see people fighting. Whether on the road, at the office, at an event, or in any other scenario, I feel the cause of the fight is worthless. If I begin the story from within our homes, you will see our ancestors fought for the peace of land. That land belonged to no one; it was once under the supervision of our forefathers and long ago remained in the custody of their forefathers, and now they are arguing about who will take it.

The Part Which Parted Us

It's the same piece of land that once remained an issue among our ancestors too, so do you expect this problem will be shifted to our next generation? Yes, for sure. Why cause bloodshed for something that was never the permanent possession of any person? Those who filled the tender for it are now lying deeper in the mud where bacteria and other decomposers are engulfing them. Can we ask them what they got from it? Not at all, because they can't answer us. If they could, maybe they would advise us to leave this conflict and earn some good deeds.

Cousin Marriages As Savior Of Ancestral Land

Some of us belong to a society where marriages are arranged within families just to save that land from going into the possession of anyone outside the family. No matter whether both partners are compatible or not, they have to save that land.

Just Another Story

Consider the case of Hafsa and Shiraz, who are cousins. When their grandfather died, he bound them in engagement as his last will. Hafsa is twelve years older than Shiraz, and their parents are not marrying them yet because they want their son to complete matriculation. It's been nine years since their engagement and you can guess their ages. No doubt their pair would have a mature woman, but what about the death of her desires when she sees her friends getting married and carrying babies in their laps? She thinks she will be able to do so as she watches her cousins playing in her aunt's home, and one day she will have to bring them up. This is the mess caused by a lack of family planning. Shiraz has seven brothers and the last two are four to five years old, while Hafsa is a single sister. Both live in the same home and might move into her portion when they marry. She isn't allowed to pursue further education or get a job, as this would broaden her mind and she might become aware of the situation.

Cruel Conservative Arguments

I have spoken about this issue multiple times, but they always give me the worthless argument of saving property and claim cousin marriages are safer than allowing others to take charge of your lands. Their ancestors fought with each other for this piece of land, so they can't give it to anyone else. So you will keep a girl in this hellish home where she will keep waiting for her fiancé to become an adult and marry her. For years they will be fighting for land, and no matter if this tension ruins their children's lives too, they have nothing else to do.

She Treated As An Animal

Another reason for our fights is so-called women's dignity. You must keep her restricted within the home, because getting an education will lead her to a bright future. She will make her own career and will not agree with your decisions. You will be disgraced in society the day she tells you that she loves a man and wants to spend the rest of her life with him. You want her to become like a cow that wouldn't react when sold or slaughtered, but this new era of girls studying in college has ruined your plans. You can't sell her for property or any other luxuries. And if she marries according to her choice, it will become a war for you; you will have to fight her because she did not follow your advice.

Honor Killing Or Humanity Killing

Consider the case in which Maryam was killed along with her husband when she married Adil. This is a case of honor killing, and no one will be able to question the criminals because they were her parents and they felt they had the right to do so. But I will tell them that no religion supports this killing. Why impose your thoughts and beliefs on someone else's life? If you raised a girl and gave her enough confidence to represent you in society, then why do you think a decision she makes herself would be negative for you? It's her life, not your fight to control everything for her, and remember you are responsible for your actions and deeds. In the final days, if you are asked why you killed someone for the sake of land or dignity, you will be punished for your prohibited actions.