I Know Exactly How You Feel... .:. Late Night Blogging
A few months ago, I read one post where the author (EDIT: Thanks to @alessandrawhite, we tracked down the author... It was @gregscloud) was talking about understanding other people, and showing support to each other... As I try to be supportive of people whom I know, I was reading it with pleasure... To my surprise, the author had a strong "feeling" toward one specific thing... I can't remember the exact words that he used, but it was something like this:
When someone tells you a personal story, where he/she was hurt or had some trauma, even if you had a similar experience like them, you can't say the words: "I know exactly how you feel, as I had the same experience!"
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I remember saying those words numerous times, and only now I realize how wrong I was... There is no chance to know "EXACTLY" how someone else felt, or feels, as there are so many variables in the equation... We are different people, grown up in different circumstances, in different families, environments, etc. So, from that moment onwards, I avoided using that sentence... I don't know how you feel, but maybe my experience could help you out...
Now, let me connect a few more dots... 😃 Yesterday, I was attending the PYPT show in the DreemPort discord, and accidentally, posted a HELLO gif into the wrong channel... Before I realized that, I got a reply on that image by @samsmith1971... and later on, an additional comment:
Screenshot from Dreamport Discord
In between these two events, I stumbled upon this interesting YouTube video, and as most things come in threes, here we are, discussing this topic... As Sam said: "Nothing happens completely by accident!"
As you can see from the thumbnail, the video is intended for a specific generation, but I saw there are similar ones on the same channel... When I saw this video, it was a nice follow-up on the thought from the beginning of this post... about understanding people better...
I don't want to make any spoilers, but to understand people, we need to "fit in their shoes" as much as possible... and one of the biggest issues with doing that is if there is a big generation gap between us... Speaking of that, I just remembered one English lesson (my 2nd language) that had the same title: "Generation gap", and was talking about "no understanding" between parents and children...
It's the fact that it's easier to make relationships when we are younger, especially kids, but also, there is another curious thing that I noticed... Even in my mid-age (if I can call that my age 😃), when I meet new people, I "click" much easier with those who are at the same age as me...
Also, this video served me well to understand myself better, which sounds a bit odd, but I suppose some of you can relate to... We do know ourselves better than anyone else, but sometimes, we do things "by muscle memory", and even we can't explain why we did something! It could sound like an excuse, but it's good to know how (and why) we got here where we are in this very moment... Similar to my chain of events that led to this post, our lives had numerous events that made us what we are...
Understanding ourselves is the only way we can grow and improve ourselves, but also, it's the way we can better understand others...
PS. I hope I didn't go too much off-topic from the community guidelines... Don't forget to check out the YouTube channel I shared! https://www.youtube.com/@mrpsychologytalks001
Thank you for your time.
--ph--
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I loved this post! Was this one of the gems sitting in your drafts folder?? 😂 I’m so happy you worked on it and brought it to light here.
The user name of the post you referenced is @gregscloud who produced it the same as you did this one, at least in part, during @creativeworkhour. We remember pimping it on PYPT and we recorded a CWH podcast episode on the topic during one of our Saturday online studio recording sessions.
[CREATIVE WORK HOUR Podcast, Ep.60
Yes!!! It was Greg (@gregscloud)! I was searching among BobbyB's posts, but it was Greg... :) I will edit my post and add a link to his post. Thank you for pointing it out!
Btw, not sure if you had time to check out the video, maybe you will fit in that generation timeframe... Maybe not exactly by years (as you are in mid 30s 😃), but you could fit by soul... 🥂
Have a great and enjoyable weekend! 🌹
Yes! I did watch it and I completely agree! That’s my Xennial Generation (give or take a few years!). 😉
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What an honour to have you in my community!! And what a lovely topic you’ve brought here today!
It’s true that no one can fully understand another person, even if they’ve been through the same experience, because everyone’s circumstances are different and everyone feels differently. That’s why they always say you shouldn’t give advice to others, because we don’t know what’s best for them; we can only offer... suggestions.
Now... we have had to live through that change in our generation, a profound change to which we had to adapt, and we did, and we connect better with people our own age... but souls sometimes connect in strange ways. For example, I’ve always connected better with people older than me, and so I taught for over 12 years to older adults up to the age of 85. But life leads us to connect with many people, and I’ve also worked with teenagers and young adults, and adapting is important. Putting ourselves in others’ shoes isn’t easy; even the social environment is different.
It’s a topic that could be discussed at length and is fascinating!! Thank you for being here! Hugs!!🤗
I have probably missed the topic for your community, but it was the video that I wanted to share... so it was perfect to do it here... 😃
That was one of the clearest things that I noticed in the video! I remember when I was in elementary school, and it was so much easier for me to talk and socialize with my teachers than with my school buddies! And then, when I opened my PC gaming club, in my mid-twenties, it was so easy to connect with teenagers and kids who would visit the club... And there was a huge gap between those older than me and those youngsters... There was no way for them to communicate with each other, and my generation was like a "bridge" between those two worlds...
It's interesting how it was easy to LIVE that, but I never thought about it, or searched for a reason... Finding this short video was revealing, and I would say, useful to understand myself better...
PS. Thanks for creating this community, I will try to share more interesting videos in the future... When I stumble upon some... 😃
You know what? Souls have their own age, regardless of the body’s age. I’ve been told I have an old soul, which is why I used to connect with older people, but all experiences are interesting… we find ourselves caught between that society… and the one we have now.😆
I’ve always wanted a community; I was eager to have one, and I like it more and more every day. The reflections are endless!! Thank you!!
Good evening @ph1102, literature or cinema works because many of us feel identified with someone we don't know. Feeling the same or similar to other people, I think, is possible... and necessary: it is the beginning of compassion.
Another issue is that the reformulation you have made of the phrase is very accurate, the original phrase can feel like a belittling of the pain of the injured or suffering person.
Regarding generations, I was born in '69, I don't understand mine and it's very difficult for me to understand the later ones...
Happy night!!
You are an alien... 😃 Who knows when you were born and came to our planet... 😂
Just kidding... I suppose understanding our generation can also be a problem, especially when we continue our lives separately, far away from each other... As we are still growing and developing, we are doing that in different environments, maybe different parts of the world, even...
Sometimes, I have the same feeling when I reconnect with an old friend from my childhood... He was my best friend 30 years ago, but today we barely have anything in common to talk about...
Good morning or afternoon, @ph1102 . Here is a message from my planet. 👽 Life distances and brings people together, I think it is a natural process and it happens to all of us. I am lucky to have friends who are older, younger, and my age, although perhaps they are also from another planet.😄
As a generation, mine is a huge disappointment, it is the generation that rules. And regarding the younger generations, I share my parents' vision of the world more than theirs... with young people the world has changed so much, the way of communicating...
I hope that your health is now completely recovered.
Happy weekend!!
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Being empathetic is one of the most beautiful qualities a human being can have. Becoming genuinely empathetic takes learning, respect, and a lot of consideration for the other person who is telling us their story.
I haven't been able to watch the video because the connection keeps getting worse around here, but I'm grateful that at least I was able to read this post after several days without even being able to access Hive. Wishing everyone in the family a happy weekend 😊.
Being empathic is a blessing and a curse... It helps to understand others better, but also, it's a burden as some of those "ugly" things stick to empaths and don't leave... I suppose I was more open to listening when I was younger, and I'm afraid I'm not like that anymore... Maybe that's good, I don't know... 😃
It's a pity that you couldn't check out the video, as it does describe that specific generation very well (not sure if you were born in that time range, though)...
Have a great weekend too!!! 🥂
Sí,nací en el 1977 😉
Gracias ☺️
Yes you are completely right on that one, starting with one self is the way to go. Thanks for the honest and open post ❤️ always great to read
Thank you very much! 🙏
I'm glad you liked it, and I suppose it "clicked" with you, too! 😃
Yes it absolutely did 🙏 that’s how I like to look at things as well and I appreciate it even more in those ‘accidental’ moments that are meant to be. Have a great weekend x
Crap, someone found me LOL
Hehehe... So, the question is... Is that your YT channel, and I found you?
or
You recognized yourself in the video, as you are part of that generation?
or
something else? 😃
second
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I think everyone's feelings are shaped by their unique backgrounds :)
That's true, but after watching that YT video, there are similarities among people who are born close to us... Society had a part in our personality creation...
When someone tells you a personal story, where he/she was hurt or had some trauma, even if you had a similar experience like them, you can't say the words: "I know exactly how you feel, as I had the same experience!"Absolutely Right, trauma never be the same in everyone's life because of difference in ways of living.
Yeah... We may have had similar events, but we definitely reacted to them differently than someone else...
This is because of different emotions...
yeah well, with people of your own generation you share the past habits, events, trending things... so it's easier to catch topics to talk too
That is partly true... I just wrote a reply to another comment about this... Yes, we have more things in common, but as we are getting older, our "interests" are going in opposite directions... and we are losing "common topics"...
But, on the other side, our "way of thinking", or "doing things" is something that changes very slowly (or not changing at all!)
I think it has more to do with how people want things that support their own point of view. It's a bias that people have, and that is one of the most dangerous things as you tend to keep consuming that type of content. I do agree that trying to understand yourself is the best way to improve yourself too.
What you described is a bubble that we got trapped in very often... and it's true... In the video I shared, it talks about the specific WAY of living, thinking, functioning, for a particular generation... It helps to understand us better, and I suppose there is similar psychology among other generations, and reasons "why we are doing something as we do'...
Interesting video!
I think the economic experiences of the second half of the video are more likely to be the ones that impact that particularly delicate slice of the population more dramatically than the earlier stuff about remembering how things were and adapting to change since a whole bunch of older geezers navigated that transition just as well and just as eagerly, I would say.
Yes, there are plenty of rigid old dinosaurs out there, but plenty of oldies embraced digital and Internet new tech just as they had embraced many other new (now old) techs back in the day.
I fondly remember abandoning the use of carrier pigeons for the telegram, and laying aside my quill and ink pot for a typewriter.
Those were the days!
!BBH
!ALIVE
Nice post to read, it's always interesting to read about people's personal reflections. Agree that knowing oneself better and being comfortable with oneself is definitely a big step to understanding different people. I used to wonder why I am different from some people in my thinking and behaviour, but over the years, I have slowly accepted that everyone is unique and we just have to embrace our own strengths and weaknesses.