UNWORTHY YET LOVED

I love those days when I just sit down and all I think about is the love that my maker has for me—how he beautifully made me and gave me life by breathing his own life into me. The truth is, I haven’t done anything so special that makes me deserve his love and thoughts towards me. Life always comes at me in ways that make me think of giving up, but when I remember such beautiful and unconditional love that the everlasting God has showered on me, despite my shortcomings and numerous flaws, he is still patient with me.

Just knowing this much—that the one who has made me loves me so much—it keeps me going even when I feel like giving up. The thoughts of his tender mercies and steadfast love give me the strength to keep wanting to become the creature that he will proudly call his own. Reflecting on my lifestyle as often as possible and identifying areas that I need to stop acting like a child in is important for me to let go of things that aren’t worthwhile.

Knowing that the life I live is not mine and can be taken away at any time but only at my Maker’s permission gives me hope that no matter how hard things may seem to me, I will always find a way out of it. My life is taking a different path lately, and I’m slowly noticing these changes. I hope it will be one that, despite how difficult I’m perceiving it to be, I will go through it and make it out successfully.

I’m going to do the hard things that I always find myself running away from. I’ll ask those questions that I hold back. I’ll put in the work to get the results I want and not just wait for it to magically happen. I’ll try to stay consistent. I’ll find the right circle and move with them. I’ll stop trying to do it all by myself and just ask for help when I need it. I’ll learn to say the magic words even when it feels hard but it is the right thing to do. I’ll learn to say no when I should and not yes just to be a people pleaser.

My life deserves to be better than it is now, but I’m not going to sit down and wait for it to happen. I’m going to put my hands where my mouth is. I’ll do the work and make my Creator proud. He has given me all that I need to be the best of me, so I really don’t want to settle for anything less. Of course, this is not going to be easy, but it is something that I can achieve if I stay persistent and consistent. I want to watch myself grow this year in all the areas that I have always thought were not possible.

I want to be a reflection of my Maker because I have his life in me as long as I still breathe. I don’t want to be a reflection of my past, my failures, my worries, my fears, my wins even. I just want to be the reflection of the one that has made me and has called me out of darkness into light.

I’m scared. I’m unsure of so many things, but I’ll keep trying my best to do what I should do regardless. It is better I keep failing and finally get it right than not even trying at all. All that I’ll feel in the long run is regret because I don’t even know if I would have won or failed.

This is a little thought that has been lingering in my head since I woke up this morning, and I’m happy I could finally put this into writing. It’s more like a note to myself to encourage me not to give up even when the going gets hard, but I also hope this speaks to someone else in a way that makes them want to live the best part of their lives even when it feels hard or even impossible. Just do it! Thinking twice about things most of the time takes your attention away from what truly matters. Don’t risk it.

Thank you for reading through. 💜