RESPOND, DON’T REACT

You know, one thing I like about people is how they assume they know me. I like it because they are always quick to tell me who they think I am without even giving me the chance to be better. They will be like, “That’s how she is.” I like it when this kind of people surround me because at least they will also be able to appreciate my little growth when it happens. People assume things about people for different reasons. Most of the time, it is because of something they have heard about this person from someone before or the first impression that person has made about themselves.

I like to always remind myself that proving myself to people is a complete waste of time, and that’s because no matter what you say or do, people already have a perspective of you in their heads that they can only change when they want to—not because you explained yourself. One thing we like to do is underestimate people just because they are not doing a particular thing right or well at a time. But it’s fine because that’s most times the fuel they need to be better. It’s harsh and even undeserving as we may think, but that’s what will propel us to be the next best version of ourselves.

Explaining yourself to people always feels like the right thing to do, but we have to learn how to respond to people and not react to them. Sometimes people say or do things just to get a reaction from us to prove a point, and when we dance to their tunes, they just assume they know us. So stop. Stop reacting to people’s words and actions and just respond because that’s what they deserve, and that’s how you will be able to show true maturity.

My greatest mistake the past year was trying to always prove myself to people. I did all I could to explain my feelings, my thoughts, my perspectives, but that never mattered. I just spoke and nothing changed. Instead, it became worse. Right now, I’m seeing how hard I’m trying to be better: be mature and not act like a scaredy-cat just because I’m not sure of the outcome of something. I want to give myself the chance to grow up, be better, and learn to embrace the hurt and pain that comes to me daily.

I don’t want to explain why I do what I do anymore. I want my results, my actions to speak for me. If they aren’t doing that, then I still have a really long way to go, and I’ll keep trying until I get it right. I owe it to myself first to be the best version of me before anyone else. For me to give my best effort to anything or anyone, I have to first give my best to myself, and that is something I have ignored for a long time now. But that’s going to change now. I want to love myself so I’ll know how to love others better.

Thank you for reading through. 💜