LOH #245- I Told You So : The Double Edged Phrase
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The phrase "I told you so" is somehow complex; it can lead to different kinds of emotions and reactions. On one hand, it's actually a harmless statement; the person might just be stating the fact, maybe from a prediction or warning that came to pass.
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A few months ago, when my husband shared his plan to lend money to someone, I expressed my reservations about the whole situation because I was so sure that he wouldn't be able to pay it back, and this was based on two factors: one was because this guy needed urgent money to pay off another debt because the person he owed said she was going to report him to the police if he didn't pay; secondly, it was because of his lack of a stable source of income—he was relying on money the government was supposed to pay his dad to repay us. Unfortunately, what I complained about eventually happened; this guy has refused to pay him back the money and instead has been avoiding my husband for some time now.
In a situation like this I don't think saying "I told you so" is really bad; I was not trying to prove a point; I was just trying to make him understand the warning signs I had pointed out earlier. I wanted him to take out a moment to reflect on the whole situation, learn from it, and know how to approach similar situations differently in the future.
While on the other hand, the phrase I told you so might come as a self-satisfied remark, maybe in a situation where the speaker is feeling prideful, like they know it all, or they might even be feeling superior.In another situation it might also come in the form of vindication, like someone saying, "I was right, and you were wrong."
The phrase I told you so should be avoided when the intention is to belittle the person, because it mostly has negative consequences on the listener.
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Certainly the phrase can be used in various ways, and it depends on each case and the situation, as you say, it should be avoided if the intention is to belittle someone, causing pain to the recipient, thank you for sharing your experiences,
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The phrase "I told you so" is very harsh because it makes the person not only feel bad for the mistake made, but also feel responsible for not having listened to the warning and therefore the feeling of guilt becomes present.
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Yea you are absolutely right. Thank you for stopping by 🤗
Thank you 😊
That's a good perspective, it may not sound wrong all the time
Absolutely
Yeah, that phrase "I told you so" can also be harmless when it's coming from when you actually say it out of concern and love, just like in your case. And, I don't blame you at all for pointing it out after everything you said would happen happened. Sometimes it's not even about being right but hoping the other person sees the lesson clearly
That's right, thank you for stopping by 🤗