The Night I Heard Myself in Someone Else’s Mouth #284

It is not the first thing, because I have heard some people talk about me even under the same roof, just next door. But to me, that type of situation always hits differently, especially when I didn't go about looking for it.

It was during a house party that I went to, filled with different people. Distant friends and close pals. That evening, I stepped outside the main building to pick up an urgent call, but I was still within the compound. But on my way back to the main building where everything was happening, I heard a female voice mentioned my name. I wanted to just zoom in, but my mind said I should exercise a little patience, which I did. I heard this voice continue saying that I have pride, I don't appear real, and I don't mix with everyone. I just stayed at that position to listen to the rest of her talk.

At first, I was so furious because I wanted to jump right in to defend myself and clear my name. But at the same time, this lady that mentioned me didn't know me that well. We hardly talk. I was just happy that I didn't jump in to clear the air, because I was imagining, how will it change anything explaining myself to someone I know from a distance?

So, that day, the answer for me was just no. I acted as if I didn't hear anything she said as I entered and went to where I sat. I even went ahead to where she was seated later on. I said hello to her which she responded. And interacted with her a bit. To me, at that I was not pretending, but I just wanted to let go of that moment because I didn't want to react in a bad way. No bad vibes, and I didn't want what she said to control me. But I only changed the way I saw her and the people she was talking to.

It took me a while before I learned that silence doesn't mean that someone is weak or timid. But again, assuming I have reacted that night, it will be from a place of weakness, not strength. Sometimes I just feel like ego shouldn't take the best of me.

Since that day, I have never confronted her, even though we see each other occasionally. I never did as if I heard what she said that evening. I just continued doing my thing and giving access to those who know me better. Because at this point in my life, I don't want drama, let alone giving out my personal information to someone who has said something like that about me without even getting to know me, so no closeness. And that didn't remove anything from me; I only protected my peace, which I have been prioritizing recently.


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