Before She Calls Me Mama #284
I am not a woman, let alone a mother-in-law. But I will envision myself as one for the purpose of this post, and due to personal experience, I have seen around. It is so true that the role of raising a male child is also as important as that of a female child. They go hand in hand, and one must not be above the other because they are both humans. I have seen how my sisters argued with our mom over small things that do not really matter like that. Now putting myself in that position as a woman. Someday, a man will come over to my house and will want to ask for her hand in marriage. Then at that moment, I will start looking at the man just the same way some young boys came visiting. That moment alone will make me sit down.
Over here. I have been fortunate to witness and see how some mothers-in-law do their things. Some are wonderful ones that meant well through their actions even when they were silent. And I have seen how some project a lot of sorrows and pains in the new family that is just starting, and they are expecting the son-in-law to pay for something he didn't know anything about. I have seen these things in movies, and I have equally seen them around me too. And from this, I have learned a lot of lessons quietly on what not to become.
And here is what I know about myself. I am human; I will have my own flops not because I am a bad person, but simply because of the love that I have for my daughter so dearly, and such love can never be outweighed. The day someone finally gets married to her, a part of me will definitely want to follow her; I won't pretend about that. I have seen how my mom reacted when her daughters got married, and that instinct was honest.
But as easy as this might look, which I also mean.
I will give whoever gets married to my daughter the free will to be himself in all possible ways and the freedom to be natural, and I will not expect unnecessary expectations from him. Not that I will be monitoring him and down just like some mother in-law usually do.
This is my honest response to the second topic on Ladiesonhive #284: if I were to imagine myself as a mother-in-law.
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I love how you put yourself in the shoes of a mother. It’s not easy raising a girl child and having her being taken away from you as it would look like by a man or her future husband would ting a bit but such is life.
She must start her own family and you must embrace whoever she chooses so far as it’s the right choice.
You are absolutely right, it's not right and that is why most mothers are usually emotional during the wedding of their daughters.
That’s very true.
I imagine you would be a wonderful mother (father)-in-law, for allowing your (future) son-in-law to grow and build a life together with your daughter.
Yes, I will be and I'm working towards that. Thanks for the positive comment. I appreciate it
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I'm still waiting for my adult sons to find themselves a fine potential daughter in law. The experience will indeed be new to me as well but I'm getting a lot of advice and strategies out of this week's question.
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No one can ever be ready until it's time. And I pray they find a good wife and daughter in-law for you. Keep learning and thanks for stopping by.
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