Marriage: A Choice Or Norm

Marriage - What's your opinion on marriage? Do you think it's still something people aspire to experience in their lives? Do you think it has the same meaning, or do you think it's changed, and why?

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To a layman. Marriage is the union of two people. However, in the circular world, it is one of the controversial topics and is viewed from various perspectives. These perspectives emanate from individuals, churches, traditions, customs and the government at large. However, for this write-up, I will provide my input on what I know and what is prevalent within my circle.

For me, marriage is an agreement between a man and a woman to spend their lives together, irrespective of any odds, in mutual respect and cohabitation.

Different Reasons For Marriage
Marriage is “different strokes for different folks” Some people are attracted to marriage in search of true love, care and fulfilment, physical gain, a change in social status and the desire to gain access to influential groups. Furthermore, some settle for marriage because of peer pressure and the desire to have children and build a family. All these reasons depend on an individual's set goals and perspectives. The marriage process begins with a formal introduction between the two families, the observation of a traditional rite between them, a legal binding in a customary court, and a church wedding. All these processes are involved in the marriage process prevalent in my country. However, some individuals choose not to marry but remain single for reasons best known to them.

Challenges Of Marriage
In marriage, strong commitment from each partner is needed for it to be successful. But individual differences have cut many marriages short. While some aspire to get married, some are getting divorced and leaving their marriages. Reasons are not far-fetched. Issues such as character, age differences, carelessness, non-contentment and infidelity have crashed many marriages. In the eastern part of my country, ladies do not seem to consider early marriages, while in the Northern part of the country, early marriages are practised. One of the disadvantages of early marriages is that when those young ladies gain exposure, they abandon their marriage and move on.
These challenges have discouraged many people with a genuine desire for marriage from pursuing it.

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Marriage Evolving
In contrast to the twist, marriage is a beautiful thing to experience when it is practised with mutual respect, love and understanding. Some couples have stayed together through thick and thin. For those, marriage evolves around them and is not based on traditional rites. They have decided to swallow their pride and make their marriage work. While marriage is just a word, as it is said, it is an institution that has not provided a graduate. We learn and unlearn every day in marriage, because sometimes, when you think you know it all, another aspect of it will spring. It is also a very dynamic institution, and one of the many ways to stay winning in it is through mutual respect, tolerance and flexibility.

In conclusion, for me, marriage has lost its value in the way and manner people bastardise that institution by jumping in and out of it. Suffice it to say that marriage has evolved for those who are keen on getting it right. They still have a decent marriage. While so many are aspiring to get married, others are still doubting the possibility of staying in a marriage. For me, until marriage is separated from the frivolities of life, to a passion of mutual cohabitation and existence. It will remain a joke to many.

Thank you

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