Two Years Later, I Still Think About the Skill I Gave Up On.

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There was a point in my life when I was genuinely excited about learning web programming. It all started back when I was still living in my hometown. I had this street brother who was a bit familiar with coding, and he took me under his wing. I wasn’t the only one—there were a few of us learning together, and that environment alone was enough to keep me motivated. We pushed each other, challenged each other, and shared ideas and resources. It felt like I was part of a small tech community, and I loved it.

I was so into it that I found myself spending hours on Udemy, watching tutorials, and experimenting with different codes on my laptop. It became a routine—wake up, eat, code, sleep, and repeat. I enjoyed the process, even when it was difficult. There was this deep desire in me to become really good at it because I had a goal in mind: to land an online job. I didn’t want to wait till after school to start making money. I wanted something sustainable, something I could rely on, and programming looked like that path for me.

Even when I got admitted into the university, I tried to continue. I would sneak in time between lectures or late at night to practice what I had learned. But as time went on, things got harder especially when i got to javascript. It was very hard for me to code so it got to a point where I just couldn’t keep up anymore. I didn’t have someone to guide me anymore, and unlike before, I was now mostly on my own. Gradually, I stopped practising. First, it was missing a day or two, then a week, and before I knew it, I had completely let it go.

To be honest, I regret giving up. I regret it deeply because the very reason I started—earning an online income and building a skill I could fall back on—is now the same thing I’m still struggling with. I look at the people I started learning with back then, and many of them are already far ahead. Most of them are working remotely and making steady money every month. They kept going, even when it got tough, and now they’re reaping the benefits. Sometimes, I wonder where I would be today if I hadn’t stopped.

The thought of going back to it has crossed my mind so many times. In fact, it has never really left me. I still want to go back. The only issue is that I currently don’t have a laptop to practice with, and that’s been a major roadblock. I’ve been trying to save up and plan towards getting one, but life keeps throwing different responsibilities my way.

If I hadn’t given up, I believe life would be much better for me today. I would have built so much skill by now and maybe even started teaching others here in school. I imagine myself organizing coding classes, showing students how to build websites, creating apps, and even making money from freelance gigs. That vision still motivates me sometimes.

It’s been about two years since I stopped, and I know that’s a long time. But the truth is, it’s never too late. I just need to find the right time, the right tools, and a renewed mindset to get back on track. Because deep down, I still want this. I still believe I can make something great out of it.

Thanks for reading.

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